Pamela Adlon says while parenting is “incredible” and fulfilling, she’s learned more about its limitations while making her show “Better Things,” about a single mom of three girls.

“There’s a dirty little secret that nobody talks about, but that your kids aren’t really enough,” the writer and actress said during her Variety cover shoot. “They don’t define who you are. You still are on your road to discovery about yourself, because they grow up.”