Selma Blair has been an open book in recent years when it comes to discussing her multiple sclerosis diagnosis, but she shares even more about her life battles in her new memoir “Mean Baby.” People magazine debuted excerpts from the book, in which the “Cruel Intentions” and “Legally Blonde” actor reveals her alcohol addiction developed after she started drinking at 7 years old. Blair has been sober since 2016.
“The first time I got drunk it was a revelation,” Blair writes in the memoir (via People). “I always liked Passover. As I took small sips of the Manischewitz I was allowed throughout the seder a light flooded through me, filling me up with the warmth of God. But the year I was seven, when we basically had Manischewitz on tap and no one was paying attention to my consumption level, I put it together: the feeling was not God but fermentation. I thought ‘Well this is a huge disappointment, but since it turns out I can get the warmth of the Lord from a bottle, thank God there’s one right here.’ I got drunk that night. Very drunk. Eventually, I was put in my sister Katie’s bed with her. In the morning, I didn’t remember how I’d gotten there.”
Blair reveals her alcoholism worsened as a young adult and writes about being raped after a day of binge-drinking while on spring break from college. The actor writes that she’s “been raped, multiple times, because I was too drunk to say the words ‘Please. Stop.’ Only that one time was violent. I came out of each event quiet and ashamed.”
Another sexual assault took place when Blair was a teenager attending her first year at Cranbrook Boarding Scchool in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. Blair writes that one of the deans she most admired assaulted her when she went to his office to say goodbye on the day before winter break.
“We embraced. It felt too long and too still and too quiet,” Blair writes. “His hand went to the small of my back, tracing the space just above my tailbone. His lips were on my mouth. Please, I thought. Please don’t go under my pants, my dress-code-approved Ralph Lauren khakis into which I’d carefully tucked a plaid shirt Please. You are a grown-up and I love you; please do not put your hand inside my pants. But he did. It was a simple thing. He didn’t rape me. He didn’t threaten me. But he broke me. Nothing ever happened again, but I never felt safe.”
Blair’s memoir “Mean Baby” is set to publish on May 17. Head over to People’s website to read the excerpt in its entirety.