Selfish, selfish Custer — you just saw one of your least awful followers sink through the floor and yet all you can muster is a sly smile of “good riddance,” thankful that you can finally attend to your mass of parishioners, which you essentially conned into going to church? Shame on you. Oh, by the way — Cassidy saw you send Eugene to hell. He’s not judging, obviously, because all he really wants to do is help.
Cassidy may be a junkie philandering vampire but he is kind of great.
Things get a little complicated when Sheriff Root comes looking for his son Eugene. How dare Emily cover for Custer?! We know very well she saw nothing and yet she says she saw Eugene leave after he spoke with Custer. Meanwhile, poor Eugene is simmering down below (we think).
Custer finally reveals some much-needed information about Eugene: It looks like Eugene is responsible for Tracy Loach’s “coma.” After confessing his love to her — which she did not reciprocate — Eugene shot her in the head with a shotgun and then shot himself (which we already knew). No wonder Mrs. Loach almost tried to kill Eugene in previous episodes. This puts Custer’s command to Mrs. Loach in perspective. Custer made Mrs. Loach forgive Eugene for this atrocity — something she clearly wasn’t ready to do.
Meanwhile, Cassidy reveals to Custer that he’s a vampire. Cassidy, for all we know, may currently be a pile of ashes, but probably not. Custer alienates poor Emily and Tulip, and ultimately ends up alone.
But it’s probable that he won’t be alone for long. Custer and Tulip go way back. They were skin and nails back in grade school. It’s cute, really. They had this little thing where she would say, “To the end of the world, right?” and Custer would reply, “To the end of the world” in the same reluctant, trying-to-be-cool tone he still uses as an adult. But one day, the Texas Department of Human Services took Tulip away.
In a prayer outrage, Custer asks god to take care of Tulip. But he also asks god to kill his father and send him straight to hell because he took Tulip away. Quite a bold move, right? This is exactly why Custer feels so guilty. Essentially, he prayed for the death of his dad and, as we’ve seen through flashbacks and are reminded of in this episode, Custer got what he prayed for. That’s some heavy stuff to live with.
Quincannon pays Custer a visit. He’s here to confess something — and no, not that heinous quadruple murder of the Green Acre Group. Instead, he’s here to tell Custer he neglected his father’s inheritance (Quincannon Meat & Power), but is ready to own up to it. He’s drafted up a transfer of land for Custer, which Custer had bet him for if he couldn’t make him a Christian by the end of Sunday’s service. But technically, when Quincannon “agreed” to serve god — “agreed” meaning Custer commanded it — he forfeited that bet. Quincannon, however, reassures him that he’s no Christian and tells him to sign for the transfer. But Custer isn’t ready to hand over anything. That doesn’t mean that Quincannon won’t try, and don’t we know he’ll try.
Before you leave:
Finally! A morsel of remorse for Custer. He’s off to find Eugene.
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