Imagine having to watch wedding videos of people you don’t know, and would never want to know, and you’ll be ready to endure “Drunk Wedding,” an abysmally unfunny comedy that seems much, much longer than its 80-minute running time. After keeping it shelved for two years, Paramount gave this small-budget, lowbrow farce a fleeting Memorial Day Weekend theatrical release before consigning it to the nether realms of smallscreen platforms. Pity the unwary viewer who stumbles upon it.
Working from a witlessly vulgar script he cobbled together with sibling Anthony Weiss, director Nick Weiss attempts to wring laughs from projective vomiting, premature ejaculation, accidental fellatio — yes, you read that correctly — and other R-rated raunchiness while depicting the alcohol-fueled misbehavior before, during and after a destination wedding at a Nicaraguan resort hotel. The worst offenders are visiting Los Angelenos, but the locals are scarcely more genteel.
It doesn’t help that Weiss makes a slapdash effort to sustain the illusion that everything we see was shot on vidcams by wedding guests. (Yeah, sure.) Indeed, this gimmick serves only to remind the audience that most found-footage movies are horror films in which unpleasant characters like the ones on view here exist solely to inflate the body count.
Actually, “Drunk Wedding” might have been appreciably more bearable if, somewhere around the 30-minute mark, the wedding were crashed by unruly extraterrestrials, malevolent apparitions or a phalanx of famished zombies.