Does Taylor Swift Really Want a Scottish Castle?

WHO: Taylor Swift
WHAT: A 16th-century castle
WHERE: near Perth, Scotland
HOW MUCH: £4.6 million ($7.2 million)
SIZE: 13,742 square feet, 8 bedrooms, 6 full and 3 half bathrooms

YOUR MAMA’S NOTES: Over the last couple of months, international country-cum-pop phenom and budding real estate baller Taylor Swift has been widely rumored to be house hunting in the bucolic Berkshire area outside of London, not so far from where George and Amal Clooney own a historic spread. Earlier this week, however, the property gossip columns went berserk with unabashed speculation that the profoundly popular and property-mad “Shake It Off” singer might have her deep-pocketed real estate sights set on a picturesquely baronial and fully modernized 16th-century castle in Scotland. The listed price for the castle in question, the dour-sounding Tower of Lethendy, is £4.6 million, an amount our handy-dandy currency conversion contraption shows equals $7,181,700 at today’s rates.

The slate-roofed castle, built with local red sandstone, is reported to be owned by an unidentified but obviously wealthy Canadian family and presides over a 39-acre patch of pastoral pulchritudinous about 15 miles north of Perth and about an hour outside of Edinburgh. The many-turreted castle-manse measures in at 13,742 square feet, per listing details, spread over four floors with grandly proportioned public rooms that include a step-down reception hall on the ground floor along with an immense dining room that easily accommodates a dozen or more formal diners and has a trio of French doors that open to a sheltered terrace. There are a variety of less formal if no less ample family spaces that include, on the ground floor, a billiard room and an updated, cook-friendly kitchen with walk-in pantry and an extensive service wing, while a paneled study on the second floor is joined by two more sitting rooms and a bookshelf-lined library. There are total of eight bedrooms sprinkled throughout the three uppermost floors and, as best as we can tell from a careful parse of the floor plan included with online marketing materials, seven full and two half bathrooms. Three of the seven guest/family bedrooms appear to have en suite bathrooms, while the master suite on the third floor encompasses a sizable south-facing sitting room and separate bedroom — both with fireplaces, a wardrobe-lined dressing hall and a private bathroom.

Besides acres and acres of lawn, manicured formal gardens and a fruit orchard, the estate’s extensive grounds, maintained by three full-time gardeners per listing details, includes a heated outdoor swimming pool — imagine the cost of heating an outdoor pool in chilly and damp Scotland; two tennis courts — one grass and one clay; and an 18-hole par-three golf course maintained by a full-time groundskeeper. Long-term guests, live-in staff and/or random renters are comfortably accommodated in three three-bedroom and one-bathroom cottages plus a fourth cottage with four bedrooms and one bathroom plus a water closet.

Rural Scotland might seem a preposterously out-of-the-way locale for the industry award hoovering globetrotter to buy a massive vacation home, but it happens to be the home-country of her current beau, Scottish-born and prodigiously compensated DJ-producer Calvin Harris. Most reports on the castle matter paint Miss Swift, who is (in)famous for writing vengeful musical diatribes about her ex-lovers, as a real estate stalker eager to snatch up a Scottish outpost in order to be nearer to Mister Harris and his Edinburgh-based family. But, children, as far as we know, the dance music master — whose real name is Adam Wiles — no longer resides in Scotland but rather in a sprawling, multi-residence compound in Beverly Hills that he picked up last fall for $15 million. This is not, of course, the first time the tabs have gone nutso over Miss Swift’s alleged real estate stalking of her boyfriends. In June 2011, when she was dating then 18-year-old Conor Kennedy — of the Kennedys — the pop star splashed out $4.8 million for a seven-bedroom, Cape Cod-style waterfront cottage next door to the fabled Kennedy compound in Hyannis Port, Mass. The relationship soon went south and, after some renovations that included a kitchen overhaul, Swift flipped the property in late 2012 for $5.675 million.

Keep in mind, children, this is all just unsubstantiated celebrity real estate rumor and gossip and Miss Swift may actually have zero interest in spending seven and some million dollars for a colossal castle in Scotland. For the record, Miss Swift posted on her own Twitter account that she’s not buying the castle, though she might be interested in a short-term rental situation. Indeed, we found plenty of digital evidence the property is available for let fully staffed at $40,000 per week, and if anyone can afford to drop 40 grand a week to shack up in a fully-staffed Scottish castle with her handsome, scruffy-bearded Scottish boyfriend, it’s Miss Swift who, Forbes estimated, hauled in an astounding $64 million in 2014. Mister Harris, in case you didn’t know, is the world’s highest paid DJ the last few years running and reportedly raked in a combined $110 million in 2013 and 2104 so, let’s be honest butter beans, he can more than afford to rent or buy the Tower of Lethendy himself if he wanted.

Though she’s just 25, Miss Swift’s skyrocketing success has made her outrageously rich, and she has a thick and juicy property portfolio of high-maintenance multimillion-dollar residences to prove it. Down in Nashville she not only owns a 4,620-square-foot penthouse in a downtown highrise that she picked up in late 2009 for $1.99 million, she also owns a 5.69-acre estate with an elegant, 1930s Greek Revival residence in the upscale Brentwood area just south of downtown that she scooped up in June 2011 for $2.5 million. Right before she bought the big Nashville spread, she laid out $3.5 million for a secluded micro-compound tucked deep in the rear of a canyon above Beverly Hills and, over the summer of 2013, she shelled out $17.75 million for a rambling and very well-known mansion on a high bluff overlooking the Block Island Sound in Westerly, R.I. And finally, in February of 2014 the young superstar coughed up a very grown-up $19.995 million for a 8,309-square-foot duplex penthouse in New York City’s celeb-favored Tribeca ‘hood that she bought from “Lord of the Rings” mogul Peter Jackson.

Listing photos and floorplan: Savills

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