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BUYER: Clayton Kershaw
LOCATION: Studio City, CA
PRICE: $4,000,000
SIZE: 5,988 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMA’S NOTES: Everybody who knows a thing about Your Mama knows we don’t know a damn thing about mainstream professional sports. So, when celebrity real estate yenta Yolanda Yakketyyak told us some time ago that Clayton Kershaw quietly forked over $4,000,000 for a freshly built house on a sleepy but increasingly high-end street in Studio City, CA, we said, “Clay, who? Wha? Huh?”

Turn out, children, as any professional baseball fan already knows, young Mister Kershaw is at the apex of his ball playing. Mister Kershaw, just 26 years old, has spent his entire major league career with the L.A. Dodgers and earlier this year he signed a staggering, not to mention record-breaking, seven year contract valued at $215 million dollars. (That amount parses out to about $30.71 million per annum as per Your Mama’s bejeweled abacus.) This year alone he took home his third Cy Young Award, his third Warren Spahn award and last week he was named the 2014 National League MVP. Even this baseball-ignorant property gossip known those are some impressive accolades and pay checks. Anywhoodles, poodles…

A circular drive sweeps across the front of the 5,988-square-foot residence where a deep porch makes a casually cozy entrance to a double-height central entrance hall that extends the full depth of the house. On either side of the entrance hall are a formal living room with fireplace and a formal dining room that connects through to the kitchen via a butler’s pantry.

At the extreme rear of the residence, a spacious family room has a fireplace surmounted by a large flat-screen television and flanked by arched built-in bookshelves and media equipment storage cabinets. The adjoining, cook-friendly kitchen is all decked out with quartz counter tops, two porcelain apron sinks, two dishwashers, a built-in espresso machine and a rather massive center island with an attached, six-seat breakfast table.

There are, as per digital marketing materials we scrounged up on the internets, four en-suite guest/family bedrooms plus a master suite with fireplace, sitting area, roomy marble-appointed bathroom and a fitted walk-in closet with glass-fronted built-in wardrobes.

Other creature comforts include a paneled and painted office with built-in bookshelves and direct access to the backyard, a climate-controlled wine cellar and a state-of-the-art home theater with wide-screen projection system and eight chunky black leather recliners with integrated (and LED-lit) drink wells.

The kitchen and family room area open through folding glass doors to a shaded veranda that gives way to a flat and grassy yard outfitted with a saltwater swimming pool and spa, a sport court, children’s play structure, a kitchen garden, and built-in barbecue station with fridge and serving bar. A detached, open-air casita near the pool has a stone fireplace and hookups for a television.

Just before Mister Kershaw signed is nearly quarter billion dollar contract with the Dodgers, the well-compensated curve ball expert and his missus, Ellen, shelled out $1.95 million for a full-floor, ocean-facing condo on Florida’s Amelia Island that listing details from the time of the purchase show has half a dozen bedrooms and 6.5 bathrooms in 4,288-square-feet. Property records (and other online resources) show Mister and Missus Kershaw also continue to own a home in his native Dallas, TX, that they picked up in May 2012 for $1,248,750. The following May the young couple coughed up an undisclosed amount for a fixer-upper next door that they subsequently razed, presumably so they could have a larger yard.

Listing photos: Dilbeck Real Estate