BUYER: Jason Biggs and Jenny Mollen
LOCATION: Beverly Hills, CA
PRICE: $3,905,000
SIZE: 5 bedrooms, 4.5 bathrooms (total)

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Back in July, (comedy) actor Jason Biggs revealed on the delectably naughty Chelsea Handler Show that he and his witty wife, artist/actress/writer wife Jenny Mollen, were—and still are as far as we know—preggers with their first child. He was much more crass (and funny) about how it all came about but let’s keep it clean, shall we? Anyways, it should come as no surprise to avid celebrity real estate watchers that the expectant couple have done as some many rich and/or famous folk have done before them: They traded up to a more expensive house in which to bring up baby. According to both Yolanda Yakketyyak and Lucy Spillerguts the Biggs-Mollens shelled out $3,905,000 for a multi-acre mini-compound in the Beverly Hills Post Office Area (BHPO) that property records show was acquired (via an obscurely named trust) in early November, 2013.

Though the former child actor who was nominated for an Emmy as a teenager in 1995 for his role on the daytime soap story As the World Turns he didn’t achieve honest to goodness Showbiz fame (and fortune) until until several years later, in 1999, when he (in)famously humped a warm apple pie in the first of the stupid but highly lucrative teen comedy movie series, American Pie. More recently Mister Biggs has taken on more dignified roles and popped up briefly on The Good Wife. He currently has a regular role on the Netflix original series Orange Is the New Black and voices the Leonardo character in the animated Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles television series.

Whip smart, fearlessly outspoken, humorously provocative, and multi-lingual Miz Mollen was trained in the theater. (Our research suggests she has quite a bit of Shakespeare under her belt). Despite a long resume that dates back to the early 2000s Miz Mollen has had less successthan her husband as an actor. She is, perhaps, best known for her short stint on Angel (2003) but she’s more recently nabbed a number of bit parts on shows such as Wilfred, Hawaii 5-O and and the rom-com movie Crazy, Stupid, Love. She also writes a column (What She Said) for Playboy‘s The Smoking Jacket and forthcoming is a book of comedic essays (I Like Your Just The Way I am).

Anyways, with a baby on the way the giddily vulgar couple appear to have decided they need a bit more space for baby to grow up so they snatched up a wooded and otherwise lushly planted 2.5 acre mini-compound in the star-studded Benedict Canyon area of Beverly Hills.

A long gated drive off at the tail end of a discreet private lane ensure privacy for the upgraded and modernized 1950’s Spanish ranch-style residence. Listing details we dug up don’t denote the exact size of the single-story sprawler—the L.A. County Tax Man put it at 3,533 square feet—but does show there are three bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms in the main house, including a roomy master suite with exposed wood vaulted ceiling, fireplace, and two sets of French doors that lead out to a private terrace. A separate, self-contained guest house, perfect for in-laws coming to stay after the baby’s born and/or well-suited to a live-in nanny situation* contains two more bedrooms, a bathroom, and a kitchen.

The separate but interconnected main living areas are united by exposed wood vaulted ceiling and rustic wide plank wood floors (that may or may not be some sort of soft pine). They are divided, however, by a massive, central fireplace set at a slightly cattywompus angle and opens on one side to the living room and on the other in the dining room. The dining room, which does double duty as the library due to a full wall of built-in bookshelves, is separated from the kitchen by a three-stool snack peninsula.

The kitchen isn’t huge but is nicely functional with simple, snow-white Shaker-style cabinetry, butcher block counter tops, and top-quality commercial-inspired stainless steel appliances that include a mouth watering glass-fronted refrigerator with lower freezer drawer. Your Mama always thinks of butcher block counter tops as unsanitary although we realize they don’t have to be unsanitary if they’re maintained properly but that’s really neither here not there in terms of relevance to the topic at hand, is it?

The ever so slightly angled house opens on it’s northwest side(s) to a stone terrace the runs the entire length of the house before it spreads out and surrounds a heated, rectangular swimming pool. Beyond the terrace along the rear of the residence there’s a super-sized deck that extends out over the hillside in the tree tops. Stone pathways lined with lush foliage wind their ways to a (strange) gingerbread-y shed, a tree-shaded children’s play structure, and a walled and fenced tennis court that’s tucked nicely into the hillside but doesn’t have lights for evening play and looks in the listing photo like it could use a bit of a spruce up.

If anyone cares—and we’re not sure anyone does—this would not be Your Mama and/or The Dr. Cooter’s $3.9 million dream house though we fully understand the attractive appeal of the privacy afforded by the property’s flag shape and generous 2.5 acres. The thickly treed property (looks in listing photos like it) feels blissfully removed from the urban thrum of Tinseltown but Your Mama’s research indicates it’s but a quick-‘n’-easy 3.5 miles to the Beverly Hills Hotel. The living spaces appear comfortable and even somewhat luxurious but stop well short of ostentation. Sure, the exterior of the house isn’t much to behold but surely the kinks can be ironed out by a smart architect, an imaginative lady or nice-gay decorator, and a good deal of money. Right? No?

Back in March 2007, just before he met Miz Mollen, Mister Biggs paid actor (and occasional house flipper) Fred Savage $2,249,000 for a 2,756 square foot contemporary with three bedrooms and three bathrooms perched on a short bluff just above the Sunset Strip. The couple have lived there since sometime in 2008 when they met and, just a few months later, married.

*Of course Your Mama has no idea if the parents of either of these two soon-to-be new parents will come to visit after the baby arrives let along stick around and help change diapers and change the batteries in the breast pump device. We also haven’t got a clue whether the couple will or will not hire a nanny and, if they do, if said nanny would live on the property full or part time. Anyways…

listing photos: Nelson Shelton & Associates