Pretentious French rock critic Yves Adrien is put in “possession” of a half-dozen post-adolescent provincials in “Kids of Today,” an insufferable neodocu whose concept pales beside the near-stroboscopic montage meant to shove viewers headlong into the Internet’s twitching eye. Fiftysomething auteur Jerome de Missolz indiscriminately feeds the pic’s pathetic mix, tossing in 9/11 shots and his own Super 8 footage of late-’70s punk shenanigans while the jetsetting youths of the title hang out, club-hop and gab (and gab and gab) in Paris, New York, Montreal, Hong Kong and Beijing. Evidently wistful for yesteryear, “Kids of Today” will look dated tomorrow.
Incorporating an “original idea” by artist/deejay Jean-Francois Sanz, de Missolz focuses too much of “Kids” on ol’ Adrien (a.k.a. 69-X-69), who spends icky moments in close proximity to femmes who could be his granddaughters. Loving his long hair, fur hat and rarified philosophy (“Brian Jones was modern”), Adrien counsels the kids on this and that, but eventually turns his attention elsewhere, at one point joking with a zoo monkey by calling him “Peter Tork.” As the chintzy-looking pic drones on, even young Francophiles will be checking their text messages.