×

Storage Wars

Reality TV's fascination with strange occupations and avocations has produced some odd programs, but few more tedious than "Storage Wars."

Reality TV’s fascination with strange occupations and avocations has produced some odd programs, but few more tedious than “Storage Wars.” Essentially, this A&E series focuses on lowlife, bottom-feeding scavengers waiting for people to abandon storage units and then bid on the unknown contents hoping to unearth hidden booty — in what amounts to educated gambling. Frankly, they could have covered the whole thing in an episode of another new A&E show, “Strange Days With Bob Saget,” and would have been a stretch to fill even then. Otherwise, “Wars” should have been left in storage, indefinitely.

Instead, we get another one of those titles (and somebody ought to apologize to George Lucas for this one) in search of a show — in this case from “Deadliest Catch” producer Thom Beers, who’s really scraping for chum here.

As for the cast of oddball characters — ostensibly meant to be colorful — their primary attributes include bad hair, bowling-league attire and describing their endeavors in heroic, “I’m a gambling man” terms, without a trace of irony.

Granted, one can argue that such programs, including History’s “Pawn Stars” and Syfy’s auction series “Hollywood Treasure,” tap into a recessionary desire to mine moolah from unexpected sources. Such deeper meaning, however, proves elusive in the sheer banality of the process — basically, taking stuff from poor bastards who didn’t pay their rental fees — and this show makes its thematic brethren look like “Gone With the Wind.”

Even the money scratched out in the episodes previewed amounts more to a skirmish than a war though we’re told plenty of big-fish stories about units filled with priceless comicbooks or collectibles.

One of the intrepid storage warriors, meanwhile, inadvertently sums up the program. Perusing a storage space along with other auction pros, he snorts, “A lot of people are looking at this unit and all they see is junk.” We hear ya, pal.

Thankfully, A&E (which ordered a dozen half-hour episodes) will air them two at a time, freeing up space on the network, anyway, that much more quickly.

Storage Wars

A&E, Wed. Dec. 1, 10 p.m.

Production: Produced by Original Prods. Executive producers, Thom Beers, Philip Segal; co-executive producers, Jeff Conroy, Dolph Scott. 30 MIN.

More TV

  • Mergers and Deals Placeholder

    Tegna Confirms Two Acquisition Offers Withdrawn Amid Coronavirus Upheaval

    Tegna confirmed Sunday that two suitors for the station group have recently withdrawn acquisition offers, citing the upheaval in the broader marketplace caused by the coronavirus crisis. Tegna’s statement is the company’s first acknowledgement that it has received four unsolicited acquisition offers in recent weeks. Two of those have since been withdrawn while the other [...]

  • David Schramm

    David Schramm, Star on NBC's 'Wings,' Dies at 73

    David Schramm, a stage actor who was also a star on the NBC comedy “Wings,” has died. He was 73. Schramm was a founding member of New York’s The Acting Company, which announced the news of his death on Sunday. He played Roy Biggins, the rival airline owner on “Wings,” and appeared in all 172 [...]

  • Photos of CBS News anchors, correspondents

    Maria Mercader, CBS News Veteran, Dies at 54 Due to Coronavirus

    Maria Mercader, whose work at CBS News helped deliver the division’s breaking news from the U.S. and around the world to viewers, died Sunday due to coronavirus, CBS News said. She was 54 years old and had been on medical leave for an unrelated matter since the last week in February. CBS News said Mercader  [...]

  • Jeanine Pirro

    Fox News Defends Odd 'Judge Jeanine' Broadcast, Citing 'Technical Difficulties'

    Many viewers noticed something was off during Saturday’s episode of “Justice With Judge Jeanine,” particularly host Jeanine Pirro’s disheveled appearance and slurred speech at times. However, a Fox News spokesperson said that “technical difficulties” marred the show’s first at-home broadcast. “Jeanine Pirro was broadcasting from her home for the first time when she encountered several [...]

  • Trisha Yearwood and Garth BrooksMusiCares Person

    Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood Sign On for Impromptu Live CBS Special

    The live-stream home concerts that have become more of a phenomenon during the coronavirus crisis are now crossing over to prime-time TV. In what is being described as an outgrowth of the kind of web shows that Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood have already done, CBS has scheduled an hour-long special, “Garth & Trisha Live!,” [...]

  • Tiger King

    'Tiger King' Ranks as TV's Most Popular Show Right Now, According to Rotten Tomatoes

    Netflix has a tiger tale that has punched into the zeitgeist with “Tiger King,” stocked with a cast of real-life bizarre personalities and sinister plot twists. “Tiger Tale,” a true-crime-style docuseries that debuted March 20 on Netflix, ranks as the most popular current TV show, according to Rotten Tomatoes. It has a 97% critic’s rating [...]

  • La Unidad

    Movistar Plus Pitches ‘La Unidad’ Digitally to International Buyers

    MADRID  —  Telefonica’s Movistar Plus was set to show off a pair of dramas at this year’s MipTV before the market was canceled. Now, Movistar has prepared online presentations on Monday where it will screen episodes of both series as well as conversations with producers and creatives from both series. Each show focus on terrorist [...]

More From Our Brands

Access exclusive content