SELLER: Gary Sinise and Moira Harris
LOCATION: Calabasas, CA
PRICE: $1,875,000
SIZE: 4,366 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Thanks to the fine folks over at Celebrity Address Aerial, we’ve learned that actor Gary Sinise and his actress wife Moira Harris have recently (re)listed their former crib in Calabasas, CA with an asking price of $1,875,000.

For the last six years Mister Sinise has appeared as Detective Mac Taylor on CSI: NY. As nice, lucrative and high profile as that steady gig may be, Mister Sinise’s heyday on the silver and small screens seems to have been the early to mid-1990s when he received an Oscar nomination (Forrest Gump), an Emmy nomination (Truman) and and and Emmy award (George Wallace), a couple of Golden Globe nominations, (George Wallace and Forrest Gump), and a Golden Globe award (Truman), a couple of Screen Actors Guild (SAG) nominations (Forrest Gump and The Stand) and three SAG awards (George Wallace, Apollo 13, and Truman). He had also done earned hisself a trio of Tony nominations (The Grapes of Wrath, Buried Child, and One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest).

However, Mister Sinise’s real and lasting achievement in the showbiz world–iffin anyone was to ask Your Mama, which of course no one did–is co-founding the famed and respected Steppenwolf Theatre Company in Chicago in 1974 with Terry Kinney and Jeff Perry. The company’s current ensemble includes such notable and recognizable names as Joan Allen, Tom Irwin, John Mahoney, John Malkovich, Laurie Metcalf, the inestimable and quirky Martha Plimpton and of course, Mister Sinise and Miz Harris.

Property records show that Mister Sinise and Miz Harris scooped up their suburban dream house behind the guarded gates of The Oaks development in February of 2004 for $1,951,000. This was not long after they sold their previous residence on Grayfox Road in the Point Dume area of Malibu to Equinox gyms founder Donato Errico for $3,250,000.

According the peeps at Redfin, Mister Sinise and Miz Harris have been trying to sell their real estate white elephant since October of 2008 when they listed the Cape Cod style suburban house with an asking price of $2,195,000. After 529 days and at least half a dozen price adjustments that saw the asking price sink to as low as $1,850,000, the property is currently listed at $1,875,000. A quick consult with Your Mama’s bejeweled abacus indicates that based on their purchase price of $1,951,000 Mister Sinise and Miz Harris are on track to lose at least $75,000 plus the fat real estate fees, which could easily total more than $75,000. And that chickens, is if these thespians can manage to get someone to cough up their full asking price, an unlikely scenario given that they were unable to sell the house in late 2009 with an asking price $25,000 lower than the current one.

Are y’all following Your Mama? We have got a lot on our mind this morning and a fat nerve pill we took with our morning coffee means we can’t be sure we’re making much sense.

Anyhoo, property records indicate the well kept if architecturally uninspired residence measures 4,366 with 4 bedrooms and 4 poopers while listing information shows there are 5 bedrooms and 5.5 poopers. We don’t, natch, know why the discrepancy in the boo-dwar and terlit counts but it may have something to do with the small media room that includes a walk-in closet, private pooper and kitchen area. According to listing information, this room could be pressed into service as a fifth bedroom or possibly as a room for the in-laws or small suite for staff. Loword knows olSveta would l.o.v.e. her own kitchenette to be sure but we’d sooner give up our comfort craving and querulous house gurl than live in a gated community in hot as Hades Calabasas. Don’t none of your suburbanites take offense and get your panties all up in a twist. It’s just a preference Your Mama has for not living in self-contained suburban tract house developments no matter how expensive or deeluxe the digs.

The master suite, a long narrow affair with a silly bead board ceiling treatment and a weird faux fireplace–has tan walls, beige carpeting, light khaki colored curtains. There are also two closets with custom organizers and a large pooper drowning in biscuit colored tumbled marble with twin vanities, a spa tub and separate shower. Each of the three other family bedrooms contain a private pooper, a situation that ensures maximum privacy and odor control.

A brick floored and trellised patio off the kitchen/breakfast/family room area leads out to the salt water swimming pool and spa, both of which are surrounded by brick patio. There are also, according to listing information, a waterfall and koi pond in the back yard as well as an outdoor living room that overlooks the swimming pool with brick pillars, a trellised room and an outdoor fireplace.

Listing information indicates the two-story traditional was once a model home and is fitted with hundreds of thousands of dollars in upgrades that include “natural walnut wood floors, crown mouldings, wood ceiling beams, batten and bead board accents.” About the only thing we’d keep in there are those deevoon walnut wood floors. Other features, according to listing information, include a 4-car garage, workshop, a second floor family room area, interior laundry facilities, and monthly home owner’s dues of $334 that cover access to the community clubhouse, exercise facilities, and tennis courts as well as courtesy patrol of the area within the gates of the community.

We’re guessing that based on the rather lackluster day-core that Mister Sinise, Miz Harris and their three shorties have already left the premises and that the house has been staged for selling. It would appear that the Sinise/Harris family has moved on to the larger and far more expensive house located just a few blocks away in the same damn gated community as this house that property records reveal they bought in December of 2007 for $3,550,000. That house, according to property records, measures 5,199 square feet and includes 5 bedrooms and 4 poopers.

Photos: Everett Fenton Gidley