SELLER: It Does Not Really Matter Because He Ain’t Famous
LOCATION: Tryon Road, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $2,949,000
SIZE: 4, 545 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 4 full and 2 half bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Celebrity estate, gated & high above the city, this SBY designed architectural is the perfect fusion of mid-century modern aesthetic & laid back LA lifestyle. Open floor plan where expanses of glass dissolve boundaries between the house & the city below. Views stretch from Downtown to ocean, and are enjoyed from almost any room in the home. Gourmet kitch w/ top appliances. Sexy master w/ own den + walk-in steam shower. Wrap around viewing decks & lush yard w/ pool & fire pit.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Your Mama is old, but we are not so old that we don’t know that the young people like this Rihanna gurl that sings about umbrellas and who was recently all kinds of mixed up with a man who (allegedly) gave her a big ol‘ beat down on some street in the Hancock Park area of Los Angeles. Lawhd have mercy children, what kind of man hits on a woman? Seriously, a man has gotta be making up for some seriously small naughty bits if he needs to be smackin‘ up on a ladee to feel like a man, you know what we’re saying?

Anyhoo, at the time of the (alleged) physical altercation, Miss Rihanna, whose real name is Robyn Fenty, was leasing a house up in Los Feliz area of Los Angeles. That house, owned by a man who was once called a writer and a designer in an article in the L.A. Times, recently hit the market with an asking price of $2,949,000. The owner has been trying to unload this house since sometime in mid-2007 when it was on the market with the wonky asking price of $3,249,500.

Property records show the Tryon Road residence was purchased by its current owner in November of 2005 for $1,699,000 and listing information indicates the three story hillside house measures 4,545 square feet with 4 bedrooms and 4 full bathrooms and 2 half bathrooms which makes six terlits that Miss Rihanna’s house gurl had to scrub up.

The main floor the of the very colorful contemporary crib comprises the small entry and stair hall, a large open plan living and dining area divided by a double sided fireplace and a long wall of sliding windows that open to a large balcony/terrace with long and wide views from downtown Los Angeles all the way to the Pacific Ocean and include shades that can be operated by remote control.

A small family room is open to the large kitchen which sports some crazy Rosewood cabinetry and grass green glass counter tops that Your Mama hopes look better in person because in the photos, they are painful to look at. The main floor is completed by a triangular shaped powder pooper and a guest bedroom and bathroom.

The second floor includes two family bedrooms, each with a private pooper. Strangely and unfortunately, the laundry room is located in the large walk-in closet of one of the bedrooms, a situation that surely had better remedy than this. The master suite includes a large sitting area that opens to a narrow balcony that overlooks the glittery lights of Los Angeles, and the bedroom area has a wood burning fireplace for all those people who think doing it on a bear skin rug in front of a fire is romantic. The large but awkwardly shaped master bath features a large soaking tub for two, double sinks, a private cubby for the terlit and a party-sized steam shower.

A narrow space which we believe to be located under the main floor and not accessible without going outside has been kitted out as a media room with a large plasma tee-vee, surround sound and a half bathroom that facilitates quickie trips to the terlit during commercial breaks without having to climb up and down a bunch of bothersome stairs. While the 2-car garage is located on Tryon Road, the entrance to the house is also and best accessible from a private drive off of N. Gramercy Place.

In addition to the wide west facing balconies–which thankfully have wide awnings to shield the interior spaces from the particularly blistering afternoon sunshine, the outdoor spaces include a narrow, serene and decked courtyard area tucked up between the house and the hillside that has an outdoor fireplace sort of thing. The small swimming pool, spa and outdoor shower are all well sited for privacy and nood sunbathing and according to the article in the L.A. Times, the swimming pool can be shaded by a retractable awning.

No children, Your Mama should not have to remind y’all not to get up in your hoopdies and drive up to Los Feliz to see if you can see Riri sunning on the deck because not only does Miss Rihanna have some scary security, she’d done moved on and does not live here anymore.

Although we do know Miss RiRi is currently hanging about in New York (and reported to be hunting for digs there), we’re unsure about where the singing super star is hanging up her snakeskin heels in Los Angeles. The always spot on Junebug recently told us Miss Rihanna used to hole up in an apartment in the Wilshire Corridor, but honestly we are not sure if that is that case now and neither is Junebug.

What’s been rumored and reported, however, is that Miss Rihanna paid a steep 12 million clams for a house in Bel Air. This may be true, but it also might be a bunch of hooey because remember hunnies, it was only in August of 2008 that salacious stories were circulating that Miss Rihanna had only $20,000 left to her name. Pleeze. Somehow we doubt Miss Riri is poverty stricken but we happen to know, from Junebug and others, that she is humping around the Hollywood Hills with several different agents all of whom are hungry to sell her a modern manse in the $5-6,000,000 range.

For what it is worth, property records show the seller of the Tryon Road residence also owns a house on Holly Oak Drive that he snatched up for $880,000 from actor Blair Underwood.