SELLER: Alan Jackson
LOCATION: Moran Road, Franklin, TN
PRICE: $38,000,000
SIZE: 19,000 square feet (approx.), 6 bedrooms, 7 full and 2 half bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Magnificent offering w/o compare. Bordered by Harpeth River, surrounded by equestrian estates. Amenities include stocked & aerated lake w/boat house & 3 ponds, 20 car garage, gymnasium, 2 bed log cabin overlooking river, barn w/2 bed apt above,pole barn & more.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Sorry for the delay children, Your Mama has had our big BMW in the damn shop all morning (and for the fourth time) with a niggling problem those people cain’t seem to get fixed and it has left us exhausted, humorless and in search of a giant pitcher of mid-day gin and tonics.

Every now and then a celebrity owned property comes along that’s really more resort than residence. Such is the case with new country music super star Alan Jackson’s legendarily leviathan Franklin, TN spread that recently landed on the open market with a not very down home asking price of $38,000,000. This turn of events probably isn’t much of a surprise with Nashvillians since just a couple of weeks ago Mister Jackson actually hinted to the good people at Nashville Scene that he and the wifey were considering lightening their real estate load and settling down into something a little less high maintenance.

Although Your Mama lurves us some old school country crooning we knew not a thing about Mister Jackson when we received word of the listing from Franky Franklin. A quick sweep across the interweb learned Your Mama that his heyday was the 1990s when he earned a slew of Country Music Award nominations, has been inducted into the Grand Ole Opry and in 2001 wrote some sort of sappy patriotic paean regarding the events of nine-eleven that shot him to the top of the charts, catapulted him back into the mainstream limelight, made him the belle of the NASCAR ball and more than likely earned him more money than Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter will see in a long lifetime.

In 1993, after buying up 135 rural acres in Franklin, TN bordered on two sides by the slim and winding Harpath River, Mister Jackson and his memoir writing wifey Denise spent two years building a massive and many-pillared monument to their new found wealth and success which is reported to measure in at around 19,000 square feet. Mister and Missus Jackson quaintly dubbed the estate Sweetbriar, which this Yankee imagines is pronounced Sweetbraher by all those people with that wonderful southern drawl that Your Mama likes so much.

Listing information for the colossal faux-Colonial style mansion on Moran Road reveals there are 6 bedrooms and 9 terlits spread throughout 7 full and 2 half poopers. The front gates open to a long, dead straight drive way that leads a circular motor court and the entrance hall has maple floors and two circular staircases rising to the family’s private quarters at either end. To the east of the long French door lined entrance hall, according to listing information and previous reports, is a hotel lobby-like living room with shiny wood floors, adouble height ceiling, a monolithic curved wall of paned glass at one end and a Chevy-sized chandelier, The massive Mexican-marble fireplace surround is identical twin of the one in the adjacent dining room. Nearby is Mister Jackson’s private paneled office where he reportedly keeps half a dozen gee-tars, a few of his many music awards and a tie that reportedly belonged to country king Hank Williams.

The west wing contains the oddly configured, maple and travertine floored country kitchen that is open to an informal breakfast room and the humongous family room anchored by a massive stone fireplace, filled with a truckload of beige and brown comestibles, rising to a double height ceiling with two very tall walls of paned glazing, and opening into a glassed in porch that looks out over the cee-ment pond and the pancake flat rear grounds of the estate.

Stuffed from carpet to ceiling with all things beige and gold and neutral colored, the master suite is far too Architectural Digest-y for Your Mamas personal preferences in home day-core. There are heavy moldings, a coffered ceilings, one of the home’s 5 fireplaces and dual bathrooms including a beige and brown marble checker-floored number with a circular soaking tub, weird mood lighting and a ficus tree in the corner that we’d bet everything we have is fake.

The vast grounds include a 20-car garage where Mister Jackson keeps all his many vintage automobiles, a separate barn-like building that houses the indoor tennis and basketball court, several fenced pastures, 3 small ponds plus one 10 acre pond that has been stocked with fish and includes a three bay boat house and a white sand beach, a lake side barn with a 2 bedroom guest or staff apartment on the second floor and a large stone patio with an outdoor fireplace overlooking the lake where the Jackson’s could host cook-outs and fish frys for 100 or more of their closest friends. And let’s not forget the ATV/go cart track or the grass airplane runway which Mister Jackson (no longer maintained). At the far end of the property, as far from the main house as is possible sits a 2-bedroom log cabin that is perched along the gurgling river Harpath River.

It’s quite possible the country music couple have already purchased their next, smaller and less lavish property. Property records show the Jackson’s own all kinds of property around Nashville including a lake side property in Smithville where Mister Jackson will perhaps next hang his cowboy hat.