BUYER: Ali Larter and Hayes MacArthur
LOCATION: Astral Drive, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $2,925,000
SIZE: 5,500 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: This stunning 2007 Brian Murphy Architectural on appx 1/2 acre offers expansive views & privacy. The spacious three story home with an open floor plan features walls of glass throughout. Exquisite modern finishes complement the appx 5,500 sqft of interior space. The professional inspired kitchen features state of the art appliances. Master suite with fireplace has private balcony & wardrobe closet. Large master bath w/ spa tub & steam shower. Huge upper sun deck overlooks large grassy flat yard.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Your Mama recently received a friendly missive from Sammy Sendsalong who thoughtfully provided a link over to the online version of a publication–which we decline to name–about a celebrity real estate transaction in Los Angeles. Listen butter beans, it’s not that Your Mama does not like to give credit where credit is due. It’s that we like credit where credit is due too. See, this particular publication discusses properties previously dished and discussed on our little online endeavor all the damn time and has never, ever, not even once credited Your Mama for our efforts. So, screw ’em, we’re no longer going to credit them for celebrity real estate tidbits they get to first. Oh lo-ward children, can y’all tell Your Mama woke up on the wrong side of the damn bed this morning?

Let’s quit our bitching and whining and move on to the real estate estate matter at hand. The property we’re going to discuss this morning, located in the star-studded Nichols Canyon area of Los Angeles, was purchased by former Ford model turned actress Ali Larter and her new huzband, actor/comedian Hayes MacArthur. Your Mama freely confesses that we had never heard of Mister MacArthur before. After a few minutes clicking and clacking on the keyboard of our trusty laptop we turned up some bizness about him being named after Helen Hayes and also that the couple were married at the Kennebunkport, ME estate of Mister MacArthur’s parents. Your Mama wonders if ol‘ 41 and big boned Barb were invited to the nuptials since they too live in Kennebunkport even though they like to pretend they’re from the Tee-Ex.

Miss Larter got her start in Hollywood in the late 1990s when she worked her pretty blond stuff in films like Varsity Blues, Giving It Up, Drive Me Crazy and the remake of House on Haunted Hill. Your Mama has neither seen nor heard of any of those movies. From there, Miss Larter’s career picked up with roles in more movies we’ve never seen nor heard of including Final Destination, American Outlaws and Jay and Silent Bobby Strike Back. She did appear in Legally Blond with the lavishly paid Reese Witherspoon, but we really can’t recall what role she played in that. In 2006 Miss Larter landed a starring role on the Emmy nominated sci-fi drama Heroes which we’ve never bothered to watch because ex-internet strippers with supernatural powers just ain’t our cup of tee-vee tea.

Anyhoo, property records and sales information Your Mama managed to squirrel off the internets shows that Miss Larter and Mister MacArthur actually bought their concrete colored contempo back in late June of 2009 for $2,925,000. Listing information indicates the three story dwelling was designed by an architect named Brian Murphy and built in 2007 with approximately 5,500 square feet that includes 4 bedrooms and 5.5 poopers.

The day-core in the listing photographs is, obviously, not that of Miss Larter and/or Mister MacArthur so Your Mama suggest we all try to look beyond the half-assed attempt at an eclectic, wish it was done by Kelly Wearstler Hollywood Regency Revival sort of thing that’s going on there.

The open plan main floor is divided by a series of floating, open tread staircases that make Your Mama nervous to look at. On one side of the staircases is the living room on the other the dining area and the super sleek kitchen that is so white it makes Your Mama want to throw some tomato juice around in there. Stark white walls and very pale, wide plank wood floors unify the two areas which also share a long wall with four over-sized sliding glass doors that open to a terrace that runs most of the length of the house and overlooks the flat and grassy back yard below and the canyon beyond.

The top floor master bedroom has a fireplace for romantical type–of which Your Mama is decidedly not, a canyon view balcony, a studio apartment sized walk in closet with custom fittings, and a large bathroom that is so white it looks like you could conduct lab experiments in it. The lower floor, level with the backyard, contains various rooms that include a wood floored and low ceiling family room-like space that opens to a covered terrace that, like the terrace upstairs, runs nearly the entire length of the back of the house.

There is a large roof terrace accessed via a spiral staircase that would surely require Your Mama down a fat nerve pill followed by a tall gin & tonic before we even thought about climbing it. The brave who manage to haul their hineys up the spiral staircase find a fairly expansive space with lovely and enviable 360 degree views of tree tops and the canyon. Your Mama can only hope there are no neighbors with sight lines down on this terrace because it really is the perfect spot for sunbathing in the nood.

The backyard is unusually flat for a canyon property and is currently “landscaped” with little more than large lawn. Your Mama realizes that not everyone enjoys paddling around in a giant vat of chlorinated water, but for nearly three million clams of our money we better find a damn ceement pond in the backyard.

As a final note, Your Mama wishes Miss Larter and Mister MacArthur well in their new marriage and new home. But we also hope they’ll listen to Your Mama and hire a nice, gay decorator to work out the interior day-core of this house because in the wrong hands, an all-white modern manse like this can easily feel unfriendly and ice cold.

Miss Larter and Mister MacArthurs new nearby neighbors include has-been comedian Pauly Shore and oil scion and actor Balthazar Getty, although it may only be the philandering Mister Getty’s estranged wifey Rosetta and their four children who live there now.