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Robert James Hoffman III, who stars in “Step Up 2 the Streets”

Book I’m reading:
I can’t stay focused on a book so I do audio books and I love researching stuff on the internet. I’m just starting into “The Art of Happiness” by the Dalai Lama right now but I have to say the last one I finished, “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, changed my life forever.

Total number of books I own:
Under 30 books have collected in my little section in the hallway – a lot are joke books, mind teasers, or artists’ collections (H.R. Giger, Frank Frazetta, a Rudolph Nureyev photo book)

Three books that mean a lot to me:
“The Power Of Now” times three. It is the most profound information I have ever encountered in my whole life and if I had one wish it would be for everyone in the world to have read it. I have no doubt the world would be no less than 50% improved in every aspect if they had. It’s such a simple and obvious perspective that most people unfortunately never even have the privilege of even hearing about… It’s so FREAKIN awesome. Ok I sound like a hippy. Damn.

Last film I saw:
“Cinema Paradiso,” directed by Giuseppe Tornatore

Films that mean a lot to me:
“Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” “Pan’s Labyrinth,” “Jack,” “The Bear,” “Borat,” “Welcome To The Dollhouse” and “Closer.” Sorry couldn’t do three. (Each of those had big impacts in very different ways.)

Who do you think is the best actor in Hollywood at the moment? (male or female)
Again can’t stop at 1. And I could never label someone as the “best” at an art- but I can say that I am most entertained watching these people in character: Johnny Depp, Will Ferrell, and Sacha Baron Cohen, Nick Swardson, and Michael McDonald. (Surprise surprise…)

If you could play any real-life person in a movie, who would it be and why?

My dad. He is FASCINATING. The depth of his troubles, the extremities of his showing out, the amount of work he’s done on himself… When interviewing new employees at his workplace, my dad will pull out a syringe and say, “ok gimmie your elbow”. When they ask why he tells them it’s for the drug test – he has to inject them in the elbow and if it swells up it means they are on drugs. While he’s telling them that he squirts out a little liquid and makes sure it hits them… (in the end he tells them he was kidding and most people get a kick out of it). I mean sure I do this kind of stuff, but for the sake of a hidden camera so the world can have a laugh- but he does this stuff all the time and purely for his own enjoyment. He’s nuts and I love it.

Who do you look to for inspiration?
Johnny Brennan of the Jerky Boys. Characters: AMAZING. Jokes: BRILLIANT. Balls: HUGE. It reminds me of what I aim to create: entertainment that hits you in the face and makes you excited to go tell a friend. But I get way more inspired by music than any one person. Entertainment – it’s all art – It’s a feeling. Nothing gets you to a feeling or a point of view faster than music (for me). Whether it’s choreography or character, scrolling through songs till I get to the one that makes the whole picture come together is when it gets good. The vulnerability appears, the jokes come flying out, the story falls together- it just gels…

Song currently playing in my iPod:
“Little Lover’s So Polite,” Silversun Pickups

Three songs that mean a lot to me:
“La Ritournelle,” Sebastien Tellier
“Mama Said Knock You Out,” LL Cool J
“Elk Hunt” from “The Last of the Mohicans” Soundtrack
“Bad As They Seem,” Hayden
(That was 4. I break rules.)

Ever feel that certain song lyrics were written with you in mind? What are they?:
No, but I have felt like lyrics moved me and were very relatable:
“23,” Jimmy Eat World
“Father And Daughter,” Paul Simon
“Supermodel,” RuPaul

Guilty pleasure TV show
”Elimidate: -I can’t help watching it because it is THE MOST amazing character study on individuals who are in EXTREMELY self-conscious and egotistical states. But still it just kills me that there are people out there who think it’s actually cool or reflects any impressive, normal way of pursuing another person. The worst is when you actually meet someone whose whole personality is clearly inspired by these shows — like she actually bought it and thinks that being sassily quippy is impressive to anyone. Yes, I’ve seen this. And no, they don’t like it when you call them on it… and they really don’t like it when they find out you’ve been sticking pieces of chewed gum to their arm the whole time you were talking to them while they thought you were just grabbing their arm for emphasis…

Best hangover remedy?
Beating up your ex-girlfriends new boyfriend. I’ve never done it, but I bet there’s no better feeling.

What’s the biggest upside of the Internet and what is its biggest downside?
The upside is that it is the most pure, instant, unswayable audience the world has ever known. Your stuff is either good, or not. People pass it on, or not. Everyone in the world now has a fair shake at becoming a known entertainer. There is absolutely no downside to an unending source of information sharing. It bugs me to hear people blame the internet for this or that. The internet doesn’t cause problems – inadequate parenting or poor self-control causes problems.

What advice would you give to someone trying to break into your profession?
My advice: go on the show Elimidate. There ya go. You’re headed for the stars baby.

Do you have a dream project?:
Me, Michael McDonald, Sacha Baron Cohen, Corey Holcomb, Will Ferrell, Nick Swardson, Mikey Day, Clifford McGee, Johnny Brennan, Johnny Depp, Dave Chappelle, my dad, and Sarah Silverman all sit around for 2 months and make sketch video after sketch video along with public prank videos and then we throw ‘em all together for a 2 hour movie. And at some point in the movie we are all walking in slow motion down an alleyway to bad-ass music. It makes 3 billion opening weekend and then next day I blow my brains out and die a legend. Booya. There you go.

What helps you get out of bed in the morning?:
Adriana Lima standing there naked with a suitcase full of 40 million dollars- but that hasn’t happened as much as I’d like so I usually have to gather myself and do the whole “ok what am I gonna accomplish and let’s get excited about it” thing before I get up.

Who was your celebrity crush growing up?
Adriana Lima

Are there any activities you do to make you feel un-famous?
Um, I’m definitely not at the point where I get noticed in public so I still get really stoked when anyone recognizes me at all (especially when it’s for my PUNCHROBERT.COM videos and not some movie). Usually nobody recognizes me at all but I do get the “do I know him from TV or did I kick his ass when I was younger” look a lot.

What’s more dangerous: a mountain lion or a bitter ex?
C’mon, a mountain lion.

What is the real reason behind answering these questions?
VA – NI – TY. And hopefully Adriana Lima will read it and be like, “Awwwwww, he’s so sweet and funny. I should show up at his house naked with a briefcase full of 40 million dollars.”

Five people who I’d like to see answer this survey:
Um I think God would be interesting, Wade Robson, Will Ferrell, my kindergarten girlfriend Ashley Cope would be cool to see what happened to her, and Lion-O (it’s a Thundercats thing don’t ask.)