Previously we discussed the public rooms of Fleur De Lys, including the Entrance Hall, the Silver Sitting Room, the Library and Rosegold Music Salon, the Formal Dining Room, Main Kitchen, the vaguely Medieval themed Wine Tasting Room, the funereal Screening Room, and the public room to end all public rooms, the Ballroom.
Today we go up the grand staircase to bring the children a few photographs of the private quarters of Miz Suzanne Saperstein, the owner of Fleur De Lys who has dumped her upsettingly large house on the market recently for $125,000,000, and who we have been told has a mouth like a Texas truck driver.
At the top we have the master bedroom, a room in which Your Mama could not even think of laying down to sleep without the aid of a blackout sleep mask, a high potency nerve pill, and a double dose of a powerful sleeping pill. With all due respect to the filthy rich and dee–vorced lady of this house, but Miz Saperstein, you can not really think that a gentleman suitor would want, or even be able to perform the dirty deed in a room this ornately female that includes several professionally posed photographs of your children flanking the bed.
At the lower right we see the lady’s master bathroom, which has Your Mama constipated just looking at the photograph. Do we even need to discuss the back up and drama that would surely ensue if we needed to actually utilize the facilities in this bathroom?
Additionally, but not pictured, the master suite includes a sitting room with attached powder room, a kitchenette so that coffee and hot cross buns do not go cold en route from the main kitchen, a gentleman’s bath and cabinet (dressing room), and of course, extensive closets for the lady, because you know, of course, that fashion mad Miz Suzanne Saperstein is one of largest consumers of high priced haute couture, a rarefied clothing world where an evening dress can easily top $50,000.
The lower left photo shows a sitting room, which we are told is a private family sitting room located on the main floor of the home. The glitzy and trashy 24 carat gold gilded moldings and accent motif has been continued here, but the overall design program here is decidedly more restrained than what we’ve seen in the public room. Finally, FINALLY!! we see some furniture that is actually meant to be sat upon. Please note the series of nude lady paintings on either side of the fireplace. We would find this bit of eccentricity interesting and whimsical, except somehow Your Mama is quite certain that not even a shred of irony was in play when these paintings were selected and hung.