Anna Faris and Ben Indra Selling At A Loss

SELLERS: Anna Faris and Ben Indra
LOCATON: Los Angeles CA
PRICE: $1,995,000
SIZE: 2,563 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Located on a culde-sac this well priced mid-century celebrity owned home has all the essentials for the California lifestyle. A one story floor plan with optimal indoor/outdoor flow. Beautiful master suite with two additional bedrooms and bathrooms. Expansive grounds that include an inviting pool and a garden that lead to an observation area with a regulation sized Bocci court. Tastefully updated kitchen and baths, hardwood floors throughout and walls of glass.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Your Mama’s appetite for this property was first whetted after reading about it on the very new but promising blog Real Sedated. Naturally we chased down the listing, and don’t you know the listing information proudly proclaims the property is celebrity owned. Being the ever intrepid and nosy behatcha that we are, Your Mama wanted, nay needed, to know which celebrity calls this quasi mid-century modern house home.

So we got on the horn and left messages with our spider web of contacts all up and down Sunset Boulevard and we set our fingers a-flying on the internets looking for information. And voíla. Yesterday we received two contacts confirming that the property belongs to not one, but two sorta celebrities, deevorcing couple Ben Indra (Raising Dad) and funny up and coming actress Anna Faris (Brokeback Mountain, Friends, Spelling Bee, Lost in Translation) who might be known for her recurring role in the Scary Movie franchise.

Your Mama certainly does not want to appear like we’re delightfully dancing the the grave of the Faris/Indra marriage, because we’re not. Frankly, we don’t care so much about their private bizness. However, we can’t help but think this just might be an opportunity for an opportunistic house hunter with a couple million clams to get themselves a good deal on a nice little house tucked up into the Hollywood Hills.

Property records reveal that the once happy couple purchased the house in November of 2005 for $1,995,000. Yes puppies, this house is being offered for sale at the exact same price paid for it two years ago. Oh dear. Market conditions aside, that can only mean one thing puppies: These two former lovebirds must be desperate, or at least very eager, to dump their marital home fast. Like yesterday fast.

Located on a sleepy and somewhat isolated cul de sac back behind the Mt. Olympus neighborhood, the 3 bedroom and 2.5 bathroom house measures a decent but modest 2,563 square feet, just about the right size for Your Mama, the Dr. Cooter and our long bodied bitches Linda and Beverly. Oh yes, and Sugar too, our naughty pussycat who is always in such a foul mood. Yes, we’d have to bring her too, much as we’d prefer to send her to Madagascar.

Your Mama is of the opinion that Miz Faris and Mister Indra would have greatly benefited from the assistance of a nice gay decorator to edit, suggest and pull it all together. But that does not mean that we aren’t smitten with the blood red rug in the dining area (even though it looks too pushed into the corner), the wrap around floor to ceiling windows in the living room give us goosebumps, and we dig the two Nakashima-like chairs in the hallway that are nicely set off by the moody red color field painting.

Now then, let’s discuss the powder room. We’re going to take some serious flak from the opinionated children on this, but here we go. Mama Cooter has a sprawling and low slung ranch house in old school Orange County, which is nothing like that new-fangled crap in Coto de Caza. Anyhoo, Mama Cooter’s big 6 bedroom house was done up by a professional decorator in 1978 and not a knickknack has been touched since, an honest to goodness time capsule. There is shag carpet in the bedrooms, a macrame planter hanging in the breakfast room, and a powder room with silvery wall paper that wraps every flat surface. It is pure, unapologetic grab the coke spoon fabulous.

Home Despot pedestal sink and shameful towel ring aside, the Faris/Indra powder room works for us on the same level. Your Mama rather adores this two toned earthy green palette paired with a gold veined and kitchy 1970s era mirror and those fantastically fucked up pair of wonky hung sconces are outrageous. Can’t you just see Aunt Jennie in her peach polyester pantsuit doing a quick bump in here before she heads back out to the kicking party? Yes, it’s needs a little massaging to be correct, but it’s nearly there.

Out back we find a lovely kidney shaped pool surrounded by a flagstone terrace. We are concerned that a heavy rain would wash considerable dirt and foliage down the hillside and right into the pool, and we’re sure those fire pit things are dangerous even for sober people, but otherwise we like the feeling of being tucked up into the hillside with plenty of seclusion and shade.

Although Your Mama would probably need to strap on the oxygen tank to climb up those crazy steep railroad tie steps, we swoon and melt over that scenic, pleasing and campy Euro-style Bocci court cut into the hillside. Who would not enjoy inviting their rich, famous and fit friends over for a rousing game of Bocci and Sazeracs served by a well built house boy named Vladimir and his assistant Hugo? Who?

We expect the way back in the hills location might be a hindrance here as it’s not the easiest or most convenient place to get to. None the less, we’re quite sure that Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter would not mind the windy drive in our late model BMWs and we’re even more certain we could make the necessary tweaks to the interior spaces to transform it from ho-hum to fantastic.

Now then, Your Mama wishes the splitting couple all the best in their new and single lives. And babies, do Your Mama a favor in your next homes…hire yourself a nice gay decorator.

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