Report Card: Porsche’s 997 Carrera S

Does this ride make the grade?

By the time a new car model hits the road, it’s been preceded by miles of hype. Variety Weekend decided to see if the gush makes the grade.

We asked a handful of experts — the people who drive, clean, insure and service the cars — for their impressions of the 997 Carrera S convertible. Here’s its freshman year report card.

Freshman year report card

VALET: Nick Parascondiso, Four Seasons, Santa Monica “Not ballsy enough. And it looks too much like a Boxster.”
Grade: C-

DETAILER: Ben Danava, Millennium Car Wash, Venice “It’s very easy. Black is the toughest (color), but the leather is good quality.”
Grade: A-

MECHANIC: Paul Szykowski, Foreign Sport Technicians, Santa Monica “If they’re anything like the 996, they’re bulletproof. At 30,000 miles you’ll start getting into regular maintenance.”
Grade: B

INS. AGENT: Jorge A. Castro, Donaldson Insurance Services, Santa Monica “Prices aren’t extravagant compared to other vehicles, but if you have two or more tickets you’re screwed.”
Grade: D

POLICE BHPD: “Of course, I see them all the time, but they don’t get special attention. If you’re in a Honda or a Ferrari and break the law, I’ll pull you over.”
Grade: D

DRIVER: Author “Half rottweiler, half Labrador: aggressive as hell if you want to play that way, but obeys every command without hassle.”
Grade: A-