It’s that time of year again. The flowers, chocolates, and naked baby Cupids mean that Valentine’s Day is here. As much as Hollywood enjoys celebrating love, it doesn’t always get it right. Here’s a list of the 10 all-time most ridiculous rom-coms that you can watch with your special someone — or not — this Valentine’s Day.
If “Gigli” was anything to judge by, then the eventual collapse of power couple “Bennifer” should have been seen as inevitable. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez starred in this film about a mob enforcer (Affleck) who kidnaps a mentally handicapped child whose brother is pressuring his boss. “Gigli” suffers from a nonsensical, dialogue-driven story and surprising lack of chemistry between its leads, and went down in critical infamy.
Thank goodness “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” exists so that the world knows Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson have chemistry. For some reason, the duo reunited in this movie that features faded tie dye shirts and buried treasure. Donald Sutherland appears in this unnecessarily long story as well as Kevin Hart pre-2012 “Think Like a Man” success. The film may explain why, after playing a divorced couple that go scuba diving for a chest filled with gems, McConaughey and Hudson have yet to appear in another film together.
Even if you could get past the fact that Emma Stone plays a character whose last name is Ng, it doesn’t get much better than that. As if a whitewashing controversy wasn’t bad enough, Cameron Crowe’s “Aloha,” which follows a disenchanted former pilot, a stoic unspeaking pilot, and another pilot who is afraid of weaponized satellites, was dubbed ridiculous by a Sony executive in a leaked email before it even came out. An odd jumble of storylines that never really come together the way you’d like and characters that don’t feel convincing, you’d be better off saying goodbye to this film than hello.
The Love Guru
Mike Myers may have been able to elevate his Austin Powers and Shrek characters to pop-culture infamy, but his forgettable role as the self-help guru Pitka just goes to show Myers’ comedic touch can only carry a movie so far. The film follows Pitka, who was raised by gurus and now offers self-help spiritualism, as he is called upon to aid the Toronto Maple Leafs hockey team after marital strife takes a toll on their star player’s performance. The movie is pretty much a barrage of bathroom humor and dirty acronyms and would probably only be considered “romantic” in the loosest of senses. It also did Jessica Alba and Justin Timberlake’s careers no favors.
The Hottie and the Nottie
Paris Hilton may have been a hit on reality TV, but her film career left something to be desired. In her 2008 film ”The Hottie and the Nottie,” Hilton stars as Cristabel, the object of Nate’s (Joel David Moore) desire. Though he tracks his childhood crush down, Nate must also find a partner for her unattractive best friend June (Christine Lakin) if he wants a chance with her. In his review for Variety, Dennis Harvey said “The Hottie and the Nottie” is “so unfunny that the previously unthinkable sentiment ‘She deserves better’ comes to mind.” Yikes.
From Justin to Kelly
After being crowned the original “American Idol” and runner-up, Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini then went on to…star in this musical comedy. In the film, the plot of which closely resembles “High School Musical,” two college students meet during a break from school, fall in love, and perform musical numbers as their friends — possibly the worst rom-com friends ever — try to keep them apart. Clarkson has certainly put this cringeworthy memory behind her, having become a Grammy-winning artist — hopefully Guarini has too.
Jon Farmer/20th Century Fox/Koba
Just Go With It
What could go wrong in a romantic comedy in which Adam Sandler claims he’s a victim of domestic violence to get women to sleep with him? Poor Jennifer Aniston is dragged into his mess, with Brooklyn Decker seemingly the only person in the film to be mocked, both by the audience and Aniston’s character. The highlight of this movie is definitely the location shots of Hawaii.
Failure to Launch
“That is not normal,” says Terry Bradshaw about his son, Matthew McConaughey’s character, who is still living at home at 35. What’s also not normal is thinking that plot point was enough to drive an entire film. Sarah Jessica Parker plays a woman hired by McConaughey’s parents to feign falling in love with him in order to get him to move out — because apparently people were paid to do that in 2006. Kathy Bates, Zooey Deschanel, and Bradley Cooper also star.
All About Steve
Given the endless love for “The Proposal” and “Miss Congeniality,” it’s only fair that Sandra Bullock has an awful rom-com hidden away in her repertoire. After one date with Bradley Cooper, Bullock hitchhikes to surprise and essentially stalk him for the rest of the movie. Fun fact: Bullock won a Razzie for her performance in this movie the day before winning her best actress Oscar for “The Blind Side,” so at least some good came from this.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past
Oh, Matthew McConaughey. It seems this movie helped him finally realize that romantic comedies were not working for him — this awful love story is the last one he appeared in. Michael Douglas plays a ghost, and Emma Stone and Matthew McConaughey sport terrible wigs. “You’re supposed to be with me,” McConaughey says to Jennifer Garner’s character, perfectly illustrating how cheesy this movie is.