The Ben Who Came In From the Scold

by Steven Gaydos
Like many film fans, I go to film festivals for surprises. Some brave the winter snows of Prop. 8-loving Utah to find the next Darren Aronofsky, while others have risked incurring the wrath of the totalitarians in Soviet-era Moscow to discover the next Ousmane Sembene.
Me, I go to the Bahamas International Film Festival in Nassau at the beginning of tourist season to learn that 26-year-old "At the Movies" TV pundit Ben Lyons (pictured left of Lawrence Fishburne) is actually pretty smart and good at the job of covering the film biz.
Before you accuse me of professional cowardice, let me clarify: the risk is not in the Bahamian setting, which was balmy, beautiful, refreshing, a delight, but in bringing this troubling news to serious film fans back in America.
You think this is easy? Last time I checked the blogosphere, Lyons was getting pilloried in terms like "half-wit" and "starfucker," while getting accused of everything from nepotism (yes, Hollywood readers, believe and read on) to "destroying the fabric of American cinema," whatever that means.
There's even a website called stopbenlyons.com. I never saw a website called robertmugabe.com or one called stopcarrottop.com and having never watched his show, I figured this guy must be pretty bad and/or stupid.
So when he sat down for the fest's highlight, an hour-and-a-half public chat with Laurence Fishburne, who was receiving the fest's Career Achievement award, I was stage-side with a drool bucket.
But surprise!
Ben didn't drool.
Instead, he did a lively, freewheeling discussion with Fishburne who was, absolutely no surprise at all, smart, charming, witty and generous with his insights about his three-and-a-half decades in the business. Ben dug out some great anecdotes about Tommy Lee Jones who did a soap opera with Fishburne way back when and "rewrote every bit of dialogue he was handed and got away with it because he was Tommy Lee Jones."
Ben worked on weaving filmmakers and films, TV and stage work and Fishburne's personal journey into a compelling narrative which included a stop at Francis Coppola and "Apocalypse Now" which Fishburne got cast in because "Fred Roos asked a secretary if she would believe I was 18 years old (Fishburne was 14 at the time) and she said 'Yes,' so 'Thank you' to that woman whoever she was, wherever she is!" He also confirmed the non-drug-free nature of that storied set, remembering "the guy who brought the Thai sticks to the crew. Like a fool I asked him what was in his briefcase one day and finally he showed me. It was some incredible smoke."
Ben (never reading crib notes like some people I could mention) (me) also ventured onto political ground, querying Fishburne about a recent New York Times piece that suggested television might experience "The Obama Effect," which would lead to more black leading men on the tube.

Fishburne acknowledged the pressure he feels as the recent replacement for William Petersen on "CSI" "after he was the star and after nine years as the number one show in the world." He said he had read the article in the Times and had "started to get questions about it." So he "called CBS president Les Moonves to ask him what he'd like me to say when people ask me why there aren't more black leading men on television. Les said, 'Dennis Haysbert is on 'The Unit.'"
Ben fielded questions from the audience, walked, talked and, if my eyes didn't deceive me, chewed gum at the same time.
As I have done several hundred interviews with filmmakers such as the one Ben had just done and I think I do a pretty good job and he did an even better job and looks a hell of a lot younger and than prettier than me, I made another discovery: Ben Lyons may be a starfucker but I suspect that most of his detractors are just fucking jealous.


Festival attendees, when not busy hitting the impressive array of waterslides, acquariums, beaches, fitness centers and astronomically priced shops and restaurants, are treated to constant stream of parties, panels, fashion shows, dinners and tributes during the festival’s first few days. Actress Naomie Harris will receive the festival’s “Rising Star Tribute” on Tuesday and Actress/Filmmaker Daryl Hannah was feted last night, receiving a “Career Achievement Tribute” from festival patron Sir Sean Connery, who was in fine comedic form during last evening’s ceremony and even over the phone during Friday’s opening press conference.
Bahamas fest announced their lineup along with their opening night film – Stuart Townsend’s WTO riots-inspired “Battle in Seattle” starring Charlize Theron, Woody Harrelson, Ray Liotta, Michelle Rodriguez, Joshua Jackson and Andre Benjamin.
"Juno" will close the
The Lodger is a UT Austin student with limited sexual experience. He procured a room at the Driskill in the hopes of surprising/seducing his new girlfriend, but he's self-conscious about his somewhat heavyset body. The (hypothetical) postcoital nude trek from bed to bathroom proved daunting, so he stashed a precautionary pair of boxers in the nightstand. That way, he could slide into them immediately after sex and stride to the john in style, modesty intact. Now, the purpose of the condoms is obvious. Unfortunately, none were used. The sex never went down
Michael Jones is the film festival editor at Variety.com.












