David Letterman may have retired from the late night television scene, but his sense of humor and wit are still hard at work. The former “Late Show” host spoke with New York Magazine about Donald Trump’s administration and how he would handle an interview with the president if he were still on air.
“If I still had a show, people would have to come and take me off the stage. ‘Dave, that’s enough about Trump. We’ve run out of tape,'” Letterman joked. “It’s all I’d be talking about. I’d be exhausted.”
When asked how the interview would go, Letterman said he wouldn’t begin the conversation by listing off his grievances; but instead would go right into a lecture. “I think I would be in the position to give him a bit of a scolding and he would have to sit there and take it,” he shared. “Yeah, I would like an hour with Donald Trump; an hour and a half.”
Letterman, who refers to Trump as “Trumpy,” used a baseball analogy to illustrate how continued pressure could result in Trump’s undoing. “The man has such thin skin that if you keep pressure on him — I remember there was a baseball game in Cleveland, and a swarm of flies came on the field and the batters were doing this [mimes swatting at flies] while the pitcher was throwing 100 miles an hour. Well, that’s Alec Baldwin and Saturday Night Live. It’s distracting the batter. Eventually Trump’s going to take a fastball off the sternum and have to leave the game,” he said.
He went on to describe a time when he had Trump on his show in the past, labeling him as a “joke of a wealthy guy.” He continued, “He’d sit down, and I would just start making fun of him. He never had any retort. He was big and doughy, and you could beat him up.”
In terms of dealing with Trump now, Letterman said citizens “need to figure out ways to protect ourselves from him. We know he’s crazy. We gotta take care of ourselves here.”
Although Letterman revealed that he doesn’t take to watching late night television much these days, he reflected on what he is most proud of about his own late night career: “I was able to give jobs to people. That’s an accomplishment.”