Oscar Nominee Gift Bag: 2015 Losers

Don’t feel bad for the Academy Award nominees who go home empty-handed on Oscar night; none of this year’s best actor/actress, supporting actor/actress and director contenders should be sore losers when they see the contents of their gift bags, valued at more than $125,000.

In addition to the usual smorgasbord of luxury skincare products and high-end accessories associated with these annual goodie bags, this year’s giveaway includes a number of jaw-dropping highlights: a three-night stay at a resort in Tuscany valued at $1,500; a luxury train ride through the Canadian Rockies worth more than $14,500; natural French Mediterranean sea salts worth $1,500; a custom silver necklace inscribed with the latitude and longitude coordinates of the Dolby Theater from Lat & Lo at $150; a “glamping” trip valued at $12,500; a $800 gift certificate for a custom candy and dessert buffet; a $250 Haze vaporizer; a $250 Afterglow vibrator; a Wellness 360 gift pack worth $1,200; a year’s worth of all-Audi A4 car rental from Silvercar valued at $20,000; a Reset Yourself lifestyle makeover package worth more than $14,200; and so much more.

The most highly valued item in this year’s bag, according to the press release from Distinctive Assets, the bag’s creator, is a $20,000 gift certificate to have Enigma Life founder Olessia Kantor fly out to meet with each nominee “to discuss their 2015 horoscope, analyze dreams and teach them mind control techniques.”

Who needs a little gold statue when you can learn mind control?

To be clear, these gift bags are in no way endorsed by the Academy itself. In fact, in 2006, the Academy voted to end the distribution of gift bags after reaching an agreement with the IRS that stipulated recipients of the swag bags would have to pay taxes on them.

UPDATE: As of Tuesday afternoon, a rep at 3D Public Relations and Marketing confirmed that all of the losing nominees in the acting and directing categories (and host Neil Patrick Harris) accepted these bags, meaning 21 went out in all (which amounts to more than $2.5 million in value). Apparently these swag bags are desirable enough to the non-winners to brave the sure-to-be-massive taxes they will incur.

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