Poltergeist

It's often said that truth is scarier than fiction, and cablers are spring boarding off that mentality with a slate of spooky (and silly) unscripted programming for Halloween season. Your channel lineup can be a horrifyingly vast pile of shows to sort through, but rest assured, we're making your DVR experience less frightening and more simple — here is a roundup of some of the Halloween-themed nonfiction shows coming up:

THE QUIRKY

"The Haunting Of" (Bio) - "Who Do You Think You Are?" meets "Paranormal Activity" as psychic-medium
ShowposterKim Russo syncs up with celebs who have had their lives changed by paranormal events. Folks like Regis Philbin, Eric Mabius and Gina Gershon return to the site of their spooky experience to gain some closure…and, well, some exposure too. Premieres Saturday, Oct. 27 at 10pm.

"Long Island Medium" Extended Episodes (TLC) - What's better than Theresa Caputo? More Theresa Caputo. Catch extended runs of select
Long_island_medium2_b"Long Island Medium" episodes where Caputo channels the voices of the dead in between manicures and hairspray touch ups. While you may not see dead people, you may end up eyeing a Caputo-themed Halloween costume. Practice your Long Island drawl now. Premieres Monday, Oct. 29 at 8pm.

THE CREEPY-CRAWLY

Nat Geo Wild's Monster Bash - On the Sunday before Halloween, Nat Geo Wild is boasting a marathon of psychotic animal programming to the tune of "Zombie Sea Lions," "Hogzilla," and "Freaks & Creeps: Weirdest Monkey Alive." I mean…how could you not tune in? "Antzilla," people. "Antzilla." Sunday, Oct. 28 from 12pm till 10pm.


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Nat Geo Wild's Spider Stack - Arachnophobes should completely avoid Nat Geo Wild on Halloween as the channel is slapping a four-hour programming block of only spider shows in one creepy as hell place. Wednesday, Oct. 31 at 7pm.

THE FUNNY


JeffComedy Central's Boo-Ha-Ha
- Sweating fear-induced bullets not your thing? Don't worry, Comedy Central isn't about that either. Get your LOL on with a full day of hilarious Halloween programming including stand up speshes like "Jeff Dunham: Minding the Monsters." Wednesday, Oct. 31 from 10am till 9:30pm.

"Toddlers & Tiaras", "Halloween Bash" (TLC) - Not enough kids showing up for candy on Halloween? Get your fill of pint-sized costumes during this Halloween special of "Toddlers & Tiaras" that centers on a glitzed-out Halloween pageant in Oklahoma City. (Wonder what Alana Honey-Boo-Boo will dress up as?) Wednesday, Oct. 31 at 2pm.

THE EDUCATIONAL

"Mythbusters," "Fright Night" (Discovery) - "Fright Night" marks "Mythbusters' first-ever Halloween spesh. Tackled myths include: can a certain frequency of sound convince people of paranormal activity? Is moving a dead body easy? Can you smell fear? No word yet on ultimate "Fright Night" question: what's living in Jamie Hyneman's beard? Sunday, Oct. 28 at 10pm.

THE "AW HELLLLL NAW"

"The Dark" (Discovery) - Are you into wading through crocodile-filled rivers and shark-infested waters? Or getting up close and personal with vampire bats? What if all under darkness? No? Well fine, luckily there are wildlife experts to bear that cross in Discovery's "The Dark." Two-hour spesh uses state of the art technology to delve into the rarely-seen lives of animals once the sun sets. Saturday, Oct. 27 at 9pm.Monsters_inside_me_186x250

"Monsters Inside Me," "My Daughter is Losing Her Mind" (Animal Planet) - Forget movies about possession — the real horror existing in the world (and our bodies) are parasites. Animal Planet's "Monsters Inside Me" manages to tap into everyone's primal "GET IT OUT" instincts. While you may have missed the "My Face-eating Parasite" spesh from last week (catch it on reruns!), this episode focuses on parasites in the brain, leg muscles, etc., etc., never drink shady-looking water again, etc. Friday, Oct. 26 at 8pm.

 

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