Kevin James Throws It Down in Delray Beach

BUYER: Kevin James
LOCATION: Delray Beach, FL
PRICE: $18,500,000
SIZE: 26,509, 8 bedrooms, 9 full and 3 half bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Thanks to a brief note from The Bizzy Boys at Celebrity Address Aerial—and a previously overlooked report by the intrepid peeps at the Palm Beach Post way back in mid-August (2012)—Your Mama has learned that Emmy- and Razzie-nominated stand-up comedian, sitcom success and low-brow comedy movie superstar Kevin James shoveled out some serious, unambiguously Tinseltown-A-lister type of loot for a humongous house in the somewhat unexpected and out-of-the-way Delray Beach, FL.

In late August (2012) Mister James and his part-time-actress wife and baby momma Steffiana De La Cruz shelled out $18,500,000 to purchase an honest-to-goodness, ding-dang celebrity-style doozy of a (sort-of) oceanfront residential compound in Delray Beach that sprawls across two lots that total 1.85 acres. The Palm Beach County Tax Man shows the main mansion has 12,808 square feet, as does listing information easily conjured out of the interweb. Listing information we peeped also states—it should be noted—the actual living spaces encompassed by the entire “Mediterranean Revival estate” spans a far more substantial, real estate baller-sized 26,509 square feet with a total of 8 bedrooms and 9 full and 3 half bathrooms.

Does it seem surprising or odd to any of the children that Mister James—a man whose professional shtick is pretty much summed up by portraying stupid but lovable middle class straight guys—can afford to acquire and maintain an estate of this magnitude? For chrissakes, the 2011 taxes alone, even after an 11.3% reduction, came to a nauseating $240,492, according to public records. Believe it or not, booter beans, that’s a hefty and even prohibitive annual tax nut for a just-regular-rich person, especially since the taxes don’t cover the—likely to be exorbitant—costs associated with property insurance, staffing and security, landscaping upkeep and swimming pool maintenance. The utility bills—we can only to imagine—could probably choke a middle class Clydesdale and quickly drive a run-of-the-mill millionaire to the poorhouse.

Luckily for Mister James, he’s not just a run-of-the-mill millionaire. See children, for his Showbiz efforts and talents he is extraordinarily well compensated and, more importantly to his future working opportunities, Mister James pretty much mints money for movie studios. In 2007 it was reported his salary for the final years of the now heavily syndicated sitcom King of Queens was upwards of $400,000 per episode, and possibly as much as $500,000 per episode for the final season. That’s a lot of damn chicken scratch, you know. Rudimentary calculations on our bejeweled abacus indicate the professionally charmed Mister James very well may have hauled in over four million clams just for the abbreviated 9-episode final season. And that’s not counting the piles and miles of greenbacks, one imagines, he earns in residuals. Not bad work if you can get it, right?

Since King of Queens went dark in 2007 Mister James has steadily built his professional reputation as a comedic movie star who can deliver prodigious profits with a handful of starring roles in sophomoric, fart-humor movies like I Now Pronounce Your Chuck & Larry, Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Grown Ups and Zookeeper. Your Mama freely confesses that we’ve never seen any of these movies so we can’t and won’t speak to their quality as cinematic entertainment but we can tell the children that hordes and swarms of people paid good money to see them. Just those four movies, according to Box Office Mojo, have a total of $810,648,293 in worldwide box office receipts. The residuals from non-theater revenues must also, one imagines, boggle the brain.

Now it makes perfect sense that Mister and Missus James can afford a Wall Street fat cat-priced residence, right?

The nearly two acre lot isn’t directly on the beach but sits across the street. The location allows for plenty of direct and oblique ocean vistas from the house, for sure, but, unless there’s a a tunnel we don’t know about, actually getting to the beach requires a mad dash across a probably not usually very busy two-lane road and a trek across a short stretch of rolling dunes.

The cavernous formal living room, with massive fireplace, lighted built-in display niches and soaring beamed ceiling, has three, exceptionally tall arched French doors that open out to an ocean side loggia. The baronial formal dining room has yet another massive stone fireplace as well as a series of arched French doors separated by tall, Macedonian stone Doric columns.

Other spacious and luxurious entertaining spaces include a mahogany-paneled billiard room with inlaid stone floors and built-in wet bar, an adjoining, carpeted “club room” with another fireplace,  and a bookcase-lined library with—you got it—yet another fireplace.

The colossal and expensively equipped eat-in kitchen has an undulating, barrel-vaulted brick ceiling, all the top-grade appliances money can buy, both butler’s and storage pantries and a walk-in fridge/cooler. The nearby family room contains—yep—a fireplace, built-in bookshelves and a trio of towering arched French doors that connect to a second outdoor living loggia that overlooks the swimming pool complex.

Upstairs five family/guest bedrooms each have access to a private bathroom and share a separate playroom/den. The house-sized master suite has a column-encircled entry vestibule and a behemoth bed chamber defined by a rather monolithic wood fretwork panel. The suite opens privately to a deep covered terrace with fireplace and ocean view. The suite is complete with an adjoining meditation lounge, a pair of “wardrobe rooms” and a titanic bathroom with his and her areas plus a free-standing, egg-shaped soaking tub set on an inlaid, free-form bed of stone in the center of the room.

The luxury appointments and accouterments extend down into the extensive finished basement area where, according to listing information, there are staff quarters, a wine room, a game room, a fitness room, and a professional-style spa with hydrotherapy tub, massage area, shower space and steam room.

In addition to the sumptuous main house, the double-gated, resort-like seaside estate contains several motor courts and parking areas, an underground 8-bay garage, fairway-like lawns, stone pathways that meander through lush tropical gardens, several shaded porches and loggias for escaping the relentless south Florida sunshine, a slightly sunken sport court with viewing platform and a separate guest house that overlooks the saltwater swimming pool and semi-circular spa. A monumentally-scaled, stone-columned poolside cabana is outfitted with a colossal carved stone fireplace, pool bath and summer kitchen.

In addition to his dee-luxe new digs in Delray Beach, Mister James still owns, according to our resources, two homes in the, like, oh-muh-gawd, ur-suburban Los Angeles community of Encino (CA), both of which he bought before he was married. In May 2002 he dropped $1,450,000 on a 5,386 square foot mock-Med mini-mansion in an itty-bitty gated enclave just a couple blocks north of Ventura Boulevard and in August the following year he forked over $3,200,000 for a far more substantial 10,042 square foot mock-Med mansion with 7 bedrooms and 11 bathrooms tucked privately up a shared drive and behind gates in the foothills a few blocks south of Ventura Boulevard. Your Mama does not know an oscillating fan from a palm tree so we really can’t say what plans Mister and Missus James have for their west coast abodes but as of this morning, based on our brief and unscientific research, neither home appears to be on the open market.

listing photos: via Zillow

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  1. The concept of this house is something new that I’ve seen around. It somewhat looks like a gothic theme with the dark tones and gaudy furniture. However, looking at the other floors, then I can see it is actually a resort concept that combines rustic with nature. I really like the kitchen where there is an abundance of space in the storage cabinets which cover two sides of the walls. If I have a luxury of space, I would build that too. For now, my kitchen only has one side of cabinets.

  2. The concept of this house is something new that I’ve seen around. It somewhat looks like a gothic theme with the dark tones and gaudy furniture. However, looking at the other floors, then I can see it is actually a resort concept that combines rustic with nature. I really like the kitchen where there is an abundance of space in the storage cabinets which cover two sides of the walls. If I have a luxury of space, I would build that too. For now, my kitchen only has one side of cabinets.

  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  33. Few things – some that have already been said 1) Great decorating….didn’t expect that from KJ 2) Didn’t know he had done this well 3) Gym looks like it hasn’t been touched :)

  34. Some of these celebrity houses are HUGE! I guess that’s what you get when you make a million in a week. I heard Cameron Diaz gets 1 million per day when she’s on set. Thanks for your post!

  35. elspeth says:

    Yaaah, Wee gods. Mama, i haven’t been here in a while, but some other posters seem to have appeared.

    YOUR blog; YOUR choice. I know how to ‘scroll.’.

    Best regards,
    one of your little butter beans

  36. Anonymous says:

    Stunning new mcmansion in a middle middle to upper middle class community on a upper upper best in hood street piece of land. He must like being the big fish in the small pondville of DR.

    Don’t love The hood but have to say the house is tasteful especially for new construction.

  37. Anonymous says:

    Kevin James is worth $80m. With money continuing to flow in. This kind of purchase isn’t a surprise as a result. I say thesis actually a decent house for such a large manse. I rarely like mega manses but think this is overall livable. Also, I think a lot of house for the money even in DelRay. Look at active listings. None if this price range are this size and as we’ll done. That said. I wouldn’t buy it. But if you wanted to be there. Seems like a decent house

  38. Anonymous says:

    Mama you really need to clean up the comments before they drive nice ladies like me away. Tip toeing through them is like trying to walk down the street avoiding the doggie poo in some town where doggies are permitted to poo.

  39. Anonymous says:

    ms de la cruz has done well for herself, she used to live with the late chris penn.

  40. Anonymous says:

    The interior looks like Restoration Hardware to me. It’s tasteful enough but a bit predictable.

    I don’t understand the appeal of Delray. He paid a lot for this but it would cost even more in many other places.

    Some of the readers don’t get it- there is no income tax in FL.! That is why people go to FL!

  41. M says:

    So much for attempts at editing for spelling and grammar. Sorry.

  42. M says:

    Wow!

    I pass by this house every day.

    Not only is there NO tunnel (up futher on the island, there are, in fact, houses that do have tunnels under the road to their PRIVATE beach), but this is a public, heavily-used beach right across the street.

    Not secluded at all.

    There is *metered* parking on the beach side in front of the house all the way south for a mile or so.

    The sidewalk (on both sides) is a regular walk the dog, baby, exercise run.

    I’m really surprised that a celebrity would buy in such an exposed place – there are many large estates around that more secluded.

    It is new construction, and was been on the market for years.

  43. Anonymous says:

    @7:54 AM: As if you need to tell Mama what she can and cannot do with her own blog… Shut up.

  44. Anonymous says:

    What are some of these posts about ? Mama, you have complete permission to remove them. We loyal readers who enjoy your posts and enjoy the other thoughtful commentators posts wouldn’t mind at all.

  45. Anonymous says:

    I would never live in Florida. Everyone there seems to have a pet boa or python. Crazy mofos.

  46. Anonymous says:

    Mama you went from making it a bit too difficult to comment to making it too easy and vulgar people have taken advantage of that. I know it is a drag to have to police the comments, but you need to simply remove those that are not up to standard. It is YOUR blog and you have the right to do that. Please do.

  47. Carla In Calfornia says:

    Anon 5:44pm… informative info on hormones and their effects on the human body. It does explain the behavior of one of my former bosses.

    Love this blog, Mama.

    In the words of the great late John Wayne,”Don’t let the bastards get you down”

    Keep up the good work.

    And I so appreciate those of you who have serious intelligent feedback on decor, history and information on these properties and their archtiects and interior designers. Thank you. :)

  48. Anonymous says:

    I.P. ban idiots that can’t behave and move on.

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  50. Anonymous says:

    old hag bulldog looking candy spelling take note. this is how you decorate and furnish tacky oversized home.

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