As noted, Bravo has gone ahead with “The Real Housewives of D.C.,” featuring White House party crashers (alleged!) Tareq and Michaele Salahi.
And yep, based on the first episode, they’re every bit as loathsome as you would expect.
I won’t belabor the point of my column this week about Bravo rewarding those who would whore themselves out for fame with — ta-da! — a show to increase their notoriety; still, it is perhaps unintentionally funny — or at a minimum distracting — to hear so many statements plop out of their mouths that bring to mind the brouhaha to come, which won’t be featured until near the end of the series.
As Lisa de Moraes noted in the Washington Post, the Salahis eclipse all the other participants by virtue of their sheer unctuousness, which is no small feat. Michaele sounds like she’s auditioning to replace the local weather gal at an Indianapolis TV station. Moreover, one of her so-called friends sniffs at them as being on a “second-tier level” — perhaps recognizing poseurs and charlatans when she sees them even in the midst of accomplished name-droppers, but more likely just setting up the drama and conflict upon which these programs thrive.
If you’re like me, though, you’ll watch the episodes mostly just looking for lines that will hopefully be used against them eventually in some kind of legal proceeding, other than “I refuse not to speak on advice of counsel.”
Here were my personal favorites from the premiere, which won’t air until Aug. 5, but which Bravo has already sent out to critics:
Tareq and Michaele are big ballers.
Tareq, I know you’re American, but let’s have some manners.
How lucky are you that you got invited?
We’re going to the White House! Yes!
I love to just make an entrance.
I am a hugger.
They told me that there’s no hugging, and that’s so hard for me.
When you first look at me you think, “God, she has no substance.”
Guilty. But not as guilty as Bravo is for its role in this sideshow.