Basic cable networks keep doing really weird things in their efforts to run away from confining brands, from TLC no longer meaning "The Learning Channel" to AMC dumping "American Movie Classics" to the Biography Channel shortening that to "Bio." But now comes one of the dumbest yet: Sci Fi Channel renaming itself … Syfy.
Executives note that the name will still sound like Sci Fi, but "the new brand broadens perceptions and embraces a wider and more diverse range of imagination-based entertainment including fantasy, paranormal, reality, mystery, action and adventure, as well as science fiction. It also positions the brand for future growth by creating an ownable trademark that can travel easily with consumers across new media and non-linear digital platforms, new international channels and extend into new business ventures."
If that's your explanation for changing the channel's name to something that on paper resembles either a disease or the pharmaceutical product that treats it ("Be sure and check with your doctor before taking Syfy"), good luck with that.
And here Sci Fi (sorry, Syfy) has to go and do something like this just when I was getting ready to applaud the build-up to the two-hour "Battlestar Galactica" finale, mostly because it's pretty clear that fans of "BSG" will get absolutely nothing accomplished this week, surfing the web for spoilers while waiting to find out how the series concludes.
By the way, my guess is A) the whole thing's a dream in the mind of an autistic child; B) Galactica actually crashed on a deserted island, where it's now hurtling through time; or C) the Cylons finally morph into GE refrigerators, in a climax that brings NBC product-placement and corporate synergy together in one big all-time low.
Either way, if your urges to watch Syfy remain naggingly persistent after "Galactica" wraps up, consult your physician. And be cautious how much Syfy you consume if you are already on medication for high blood pressure or have never had an actual real-life girlfriend and have begun to truly believe that you might have a shot with Kara Thrace or Sharon Valeri.