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American Idol: Up in smoke

Well kids, it’s time to say goodbye to the goofy antics of the very pretty Jason. We will miss his lackadaisical attitude and his one-trick pony singing style.

Erin: Well kids, it’s time to say goodbye to the goofy antics of the very pretty Jason. I, for one, will miss his lackadaisical attitude and his one-trick pony singing style. In a few seasons, he will be fondly remembered as “that hot kid with the dreads.” And rightfully so.

Kathy: I was out late last night and from the lack of emails I received I knew before I even sat down with my Tivo that everything was as it should be and that Jason had finally made his exit. He seemed like a nice kid but I never got the feeling he wanted to be the “next American Idol.” I never really could figure out why he tried out for the show to begin with. I suspect he thought celebs got free weed.

Erin: So, to recap the results show, “Idols” brought back Bo, who will always stand out as one of my favorite all-time contestants. Remember his version of “Whipping Post”? He looks good and is still working the rocker beat, and although his song choice isn’t the greatest, I still think fondly of the boy and his many, many split ends.

Kathy: I was thinking the same thing while he performed! The boy needs some Pantene, stat. Also, I was wondering how his stomach is after all those emergency surgeries. He seemed healthy.

Erin: Also on this show, we get a performance by Maroon 5, who like Jason, is easy on the eyes but not so much on the ears. I realize that with that comment I’m going to get a lot of hate mail, so before you guys start with the death threats, please keep in mind that not all of us are into lighter side of alt music. I know, I know, that’s not enough. Can’t you just focus in on the fact that I conceded on the point of how hot both Jason and Mr. Levine are? Isn’t that enough? Can’t we bond on that?

Kathy: All hate mail should be directed to Erin. I have no beef with Maroon 5.

Erin: Thanks, Kathy.

A look back at Jason’s journey unearthed some interested facts:

  • The boy didn’t realize that the song “Memories” from “Cats” was sung by a cat.
  • He befriended crazy guy in the white suit that sang the “We Are Brothers” song.
  • He is naturally shy in front of a camera and has issues talking about himself. This is pretty cute actually, but you must wonder why he auditioned for a reality show if he didn’t embrace his narcissistic side just a little bit.
  • Jason didn’t realize that the song “Memory” from “Cats” was indeed sung by a cat. I think it’s important that we look at this statement again. I mean, it’s called “Cats.” There are cats on the poster. The show ran in every American city at some point with an extensive ad campaign featuring dancing cats. Seriously. There are a lot of hints here.

    Kathy: I’m still stuck on the fact that after looking at a list of the 500 most influential rock songs of all time, Jason claimed to recognize only a few. How is that possible?

    Erin: I don’t think Jason was as well liked as producers would have thought. No one cried when he left. No one tried to comfort him. They cut off his final performance before he can mutilate “I Shot the Sheriff” any further. And none of the other Idols told him that “Cats” features singing cats.

    I rest my case.

  • American Idol: Up in smoke

    Fox; Wed., 9 pm

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