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The Hilton’s Filthy Hamptons Hideaway

Your Mama has been using this holiday season to catch up on some back reading, and we were stopped dead in our tracks while perusing an article entitled Moms Gone Wild in the always educational and amusing glossy Vanity Fair. The article discusses the mothers of several of America’s most notorious celebutards and starvelets including Miz Kathy Hilton, the proud mama of Paris the heiress and Nicki the handbag designer. The article also naughtily dishes about the cleanliness of Miz Hilton’s house in the Hamptons, and of course, it’s the real estate side of the story that interests Your Mama.

In addition to their spread at the Waldorf Astoria in New York and their Bel Air estate which sits catty-corner to Nic Cage’s ivy covered behemoth on Copa de Oro Road, Rick and Kathy Hilton also own a Hamptons hideaway which property records reveal they bought in 1999 for $2,385,000. The house features 7 bedrooms and 7.5 bathrooms, a swimming pool, high hedges, and sits just a quick dash on a Schwinn from the famously gay beach at the bottom of Fowlers Lane.

Located on Fordune Drive in Water Mill (adjacent to Southampton), the Hilton estate occupies 2.7 acres in the gated enclave of Fordune, on land that was once part of the 235-acre Henry Ford II estate. The Ford estate, called Fordune, natch, was subdivided into approx. 40 estate sized parcels by an Italian businessman who purchased the entire estate from Ford’s ex-wife Anne in 1975 for the bargain basement price of $1,800,000.

Everyone who has ever been to the Hamptons or reads anything about Hamptons real estate knows that the Hilton family often leases their shingled house, and last year they reportedly pocketed approximately $350,000 for the summer season, which by Your Mama’s fuzzy math would cover the year’s expenses and leave just a wee bit extra left over for a new suit for the Mister Hilton to wear when he’s showing all those pricey mansions in Los Angeles.

However, what the Vanity Fair article so scandalously reveals is not that the Hiltons do indeed lease their house, plenty of rich and famous do that in the Hamptons, it’s that according to an insider who has been INSIDE the Hilton’s Hamptons house, it’s filthy. Fil-thee!

Apparently, last summer’s renters were mortified to find the house in shabby condition and Vanity Fair’s wealthy New York based source hisses, “This house was left exactly the way it was when the renters saw it in November. Everything in it is moldy and filthy. Most of the screens on the windows are broken. Their dogs are obviously not house-trained. But they don’t see it. These are people whose daughter has sex on tape, and they think that’s fine.”

The catty source goes on to claim that according to a mutual friend the tenant was so irate that he (or she) shouted, “Do I have to give you another $300,000 to get screens on the windows?”

Can y’all hear Your Mama and all the inhabitants of the Hamptons gasping and clutching our scandalized hearts? Oh dear Jeezis, Your Mama is sure the Hiltons are pissed. PISSED!

Your Mama is not aware of the Hilton house being available to lease for the 2008 summer season, but we imagine (and hope) that if they do decide to put tenants in there from Memorial Day to Labor Day they’ll get those screens fixed and have the carpets steam cleaned.

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