Be My James Valentine

BUYER: James Valentine
LOCATION: Edgemont Street, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $2,389,000 (list price)
SIZE: 2,092 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: The Steel House by Neil M. Johnson, AIA, 1960. Inspired by the Case Study program, this mid-century modern is a true expression of the clarity and sophistication of contemporary architecture. Sited above the street on its own knoll, the 1-story structure has head-on downtown city lights views, open plan, private pool, and 3-car parking. Private and tranquil setting on a large lot. Thi is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to own a world-class piece of architectural history.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: While Your Mama is a reality television ho who happily tunes in to the mesmerizing Wife Swap and the disturbing Sweet Sixteen program about the snotty teenagers, we don’t watch the MTV or follow the top 40 pop music scene so much. We are plenty old enough to remember the day MTV went on the air in 1981 with a video by the Buggles called “Video Killed The Radio Star.” This was back when Martha Quinn and J.J. Jackson introduced video after video and Michael Jackson, who still had black skin in the early 1980s, threw it down with his ridiculously hot videos for “Billie Jean” and “Thriller.” Nowadays you have got to tune in to TRL and suffer through too much of the yackety-yak before seeing something slick and over processed by 50 Cent or Kelly Clarkson or, heaven forbid, some post-pop-punk warbling by “The Spitter” Avril Lavigne. No thank you.

Well, Mister James Valentine, as you may know, is the guitarist for the very popular, very top 40, very MTV band called Maroon 5. We’ve heard the Maroon 5 songs. They’re catchy and sing along-ish, and we imagine they appeal to hordes of teenage girls. But even more than the music, we’ve heard all the tabloid noise about the sexual shenanigans and supposed prowess of the lead singer, a very horny gentleman named Adam Levine who supposedly had a romp with Jessica Simpson at the Chateau Marmont not long after she and Nick Lachey went splitsville.

Anyhoo, the metrosexual boys from Maroon 5 were launched into musical super stardom with the release of their 2002 album “Songs About Jane.” Their string of hit songs and constant touring made them all heaps of money and they’re using some of that dough to buy themselves nice houses in Los Angeles.

In June of 2006, Mister Valentine purchased this house in Los Feliz which sits right under the Griffith Park Observatory. Although property records do not disclose the purchase price, an older listing for the property indicates the house was listed for $2,389,000. The sleek and sexy modernist house was built in 1960 and is accessed up a private driveway that terminates in a motor court with a sleek carport for three cars.

Please keep in mind children that the furniture and decor you are looking at in the photographs is NOT that of Mister Valentine, but the previous owner.

Your Mama happens to like this house quite a bit and we can imagine whittling the day away on the shaded balcony that overlooks the quasi-crescent shaped swimming pool. The walls of floor to ceiling glass bring a smile to our face, but we would need to have them UV coated to protect the artworks from fading is the intense sunshine.

There are a few changes we’d recommend to Mister Valentine:

1. Cose up the opening between the dining area and the living room. It just looks like a cheesy afterthought to open the site lines, and while we could be wrong, we don’t imagine that cut out is original to the design of the house.

2. Tear out that kitchen. Although it’s been recently done, it looks to us like something that would be found in a suburban or more traditional home. The black granite is just so ordinary and the cabinets, well, they should go to the ceiling. The slate floor can stay.

3. We’re not sure if that master bathroom is good or not, but we suggest Mister Valentine take a good long look at that cornered mirror. Does that work, or is it just too 1980s glamour for this house? And we’re not thrilled with the black granite in here either. Do people know that granite comes in other colors and there are other products besides granite that are suitable for countertops?

Otherwise Your Mama thinks Mister Valentine bought himself a lovely, modestly sized house with a sexy Los Angeles vibe. We’d live here in a heartbeat. Happy home Mister Valentine

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  1. Anonymous says:

    James Valentine remodeled his home completely in 2010-2011, including upgrades, new wiring, upgraded swimming pool, sandblasting off the old paint and planting amazing new landscaping. It is breathtaking. Unfortunately, he also had to install a security gate.

  2. Sean says:

    Nice article!

    Have you any idea how much Adam Levine may have paid for his very nice hollywood hills pad?

  3. Anonymous says:

    It’s like living in a fishbowl, too may ‘glasswalls’.

  4. Anonymous says:

    That metal roof bothers me lookswise. I never considered the sun beating down on it angle, and can just imagine.

    The reason the looks of the thing bothers me is it’s a dead ringer for what the walls of our tool shed out back look like. So, when applied to a ‘designer’ home, it looks cheap to me.

  5. Anonymous says:

    I checked this place out when it was for sale. It looks better in the photos, honestly. It had a feeling of “I want to have taste…really…I do…but I just can’t get it right.” And I was sweating my ass off. With all of the damn windows and the thin metal roof the sun just bakes the place.

  6. Anonymous says:

    re: the worried about being watched comment. Those nearby rooftops do look a bit too easy to see for a home as open to the world as this one is. Nice place though.

  7. Anonymous says:

    I love this house. The carpet in the bedroom has to go, and I would remove all the top cabinets in the kitchen and just have one big pantry cabinet. The price is not bad either. Nice, clean look. I love it. Now I don’t care for that Adam Levine’s whiny voice, though. I’m not sure why anyone ever encouraged him to sing. Thank gawd for ProTools autopitch. Songs can be catchy, though.

  8. Anonymous says:

    It’s ok. I wouldn’t care for quite that much glass though. I’d always feel tempted to look over my shoulder in case I was being watched, lol. I like the Gyllenhaal and Foner home showcased a couple posts down much, much better.

  9. Anonymous says:

    OMG, Simpson may have canoodled with Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20?? Grrr.. I always kind of figured the reason her marriage to Nick tanked had everything to do with her and very little with him. Rob Thomas is an equally decent, down-to-earth type married guy, although with substantially more talent to be sure. And it goes without saying that everyone mentioned in this post has infinitely more talent than the Blonde Homewrecker does. Sorry, but that really pisses me off in a detached why should I care kind of way.

  10. Your Mama says:

    oh dear…deleted…that was written at the ungodly hour of 6am before a big cup of coffee. THANKS for the smack down.

  11. Anonymous says:

    Hey Mamma, that famous movie star was supposedly with the (very married) lead singer from Matchbox 20….

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